
Positive affirmations work! You can make things happen in your life just by telling yourself you’re awesome, and good, and cool, and successful, and drop dead gorgeous. Then, take it to the next level by sharing with everyone else, what you have discovered about yourself with this Damn I’m Good T Shirt.
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You can only wear this shirt if you have confidence oozing out of every pore and orifice. I’m not joking. Go to your doctor. Get a blood test. A piss test. And a sweat test. A snot test. A fecal test. Get ’em all. You have to have at least 75% confidence showing up in all of those numbers.
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If you’re sitting in the Midwest right now, still freezing your ass past late March, then you know what I’m talking about when I say you need to bring a little of that 80 degree beach weather into your life. And, really, there’s no better way to do that than this Sup Brah T Shirt. Because this is surfer speak and nothing brings the briny blast and sun bleached laid back vibe like a surfer.
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Wow. This one really hits close to home and by home I mean to say my mom’s basement. I really have been doing some soul searching and have decided I have to make some changes. I need to get out of this basement a little bit, and I think the greatest excuse in the world to do it would be to hit various karaoke nights in night time establishments throughout the city and practice my karaoke.
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Such a delicious little wordplay and a terrific image on this Comb Over to the Wild Side T shirt.
Let’s break it down. Dude has the male pattern baldness big time, so to hang on a little longer before he just embrasses the clown hairdo or goes ahead and does a Michael Jordan shave, he grows those little side hedgerows real long…at least the right side. And before he leaves the house every morning he carefully comes the long hairs across the bald expanse to the other side. And, now the shiny pate doesn’t blind people, but then again it’s not fooling anyone.
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This is very good advice. If you have dreams of movin’ on up in life you have to start somewhere and that somewhere is spending every last bit of credit you have to fake like you have already made it. Get into a house way over your head. Drive something that impresses but puts a big time hurtin’ to your finances. Wear way overpriced clothing, including haute couture and jeans that cost over $200.
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This is like wearing your own personal PSA message. It’s a good reminder. Of course, how often do you hear loose lips as a euphemysm for talking too much or not having enough of a reign on what you say and who you say it too. It’s more like a loose tongue. Loose lips sounds like an aging porn star condition. Ewwww. Sorry that was uncalled for.
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This is exactly what I’m talking about with Local Celebrity. They’ll take well-trodden t shirt turf and make it fresh again.
Who’s ever seen past-tense transitive pictograph verbalizations? No one. This I Loved LA T shirt is totally original stuff and I love it right now (present tense).
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You see this particular shirt all around the tshirt web, but I like this execution of the I Do All My Own Stunts T Shirt. Most of these have a stick figure dude, flying spread eagle with flames coming out of his ass, or limbs flying in all directions (dismembered), or other tasteless sorts of visuals. This has a very pleasing stars and stripes, red and blue, proud to be an Americana actor and stunt man type of vibe. I can only imagine how many celebrities have purchased this shirt from Local Celebrity in LA because that truly would be kind of funny.
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Todd Barry asked for this shirt, and you know what…he gets it. Is he trying to make a statement about cocaine, like I’ve been down that road, and, no sir, you do not want to go there. It’s bad. All night parties is fun, fun, fun, but after you’ve been up for 37 hours straight and you feel like scratching your eyeballs out and there’s a metallic buzz in your head, then coke isn’t the fluffy nose candy bliss ride you believed it to be as you were cutting it with your library card on that framed picture of your teenage mom with that dog you never met.
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