Science T Shirts

Science T Shirts: the periodic table of elements is featured often here, along with other science stuff I don’t understand combined with a smidge of lascivious humor.

98 Percent Monkey T Shirt

by on September 29, 2011

Fact: This monkey looks cool. Fact: the pen, the tie, the glasses, and the button down shirt make this monkey look hard working and respectable. Fact: that monkey just threw shit at the FedEx dude. Fact: no matter how business casual you dress a monkey, you still should never let them loose in an office.

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Atoms Bonding T Shirt

by on September 12, 2011

Science up in here right now. These little atoms are playing ball. Actually, they’re tossing particles to each other, which makes for a different type of message on this Atoms Bonding T Shirt. It’s actually a No Nukes shirt but nobody knows it. That’s totally not true but my 13.5 seconds of Internet research let me know in no uncertain terms that there’s no chance I’m going to grasp atomic bonding well enough to write about it in the next couple of minutes.

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This is the big four of mad scientists — chemical, radioactive, atomic, and biological. It’s good to feature the Mad Scientist Union T Shirt, because it’s Labor Day and we have to remember the working men and women, even mad scientists, who are potentially plotting the destruction of our planet. I mean who am I to pick and choose who I’m going to support and not support. If you’re in a union you’re supported. OKAY!

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I’ll tell you what’s hot these days…science and math. No joke. The following shirts have received all kinds of interest this past week:

Wanted Dead & Alive Schrodinger’s Cat T Shirt

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You’ll show your age with this one. All the five-year-olds will think you’re a grandparent, but you have to keep the spirit and memory of Pluto as a planet alive with this Back In My day We Had Nine Planets T Shirt. There have been quite a few shirts that touch on this somewhat controversial topic, but if the archbishop of astronomy says Pluto is a no go as a planet, all you have to do is bow your head and accept it. And lament the fact that the mobile you made it 4th grade is now totally out of date

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I’m starting to think Harry Potter T Shirts may be the tops for the rest of the year after that massive opening weekend, the movie has a ton of momentum. It’s the last one, so people need something to remember the whole phenomenon.

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A hat trick of goofy jokes this week. A little wordplay, plus a drooling dog representing the Pavlovian response of becoming hungry when a bell is wrong. Of course, made famous by experiments done by Johnny Pavlov. That’s actually not his first name and I can’t be bothered to look it up. I know you thought that I am well known for going the extra mile for my readers, but not today. Don’t have it today. You ever have those low energy days.

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So, is this saying there used to be unicorns, but they devolved into narwhal. Let me tell you something. Unicorns must have been super awesome if a narwhal is a couple four steps back, because they are simply spectacular. But, I suppose if you can crap Skittles and shoot rainbow beams from your eyes, then you’re pretty special, which is why you need to own the Unicorn Devolution T Shirt.

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Schrodinger was a physicist that figured out some stuff about hypothetical dead or alive cats. We don’t know if it’s dead or alive because it’s in a steel box, but we can figure it out unlike what the quantum mechanics were theorizing. I know that if you are reading this, you think I’m a science wizard, but really I just learned this bit about Schrodinger from a video on Youtube that I couldn’t be bothered to watch through to the end. I’m a slug and a dullard, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t purchase this love Schrodinger’s Cat Wanted Dead & Alive T Shirt.

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You see a lot of these evolution tshirts with different themes. This one happens to be regarding Wolverine from X-Men. Start out with the totally bent over monkey, knuckles dragging, straighten up a bit, build a spear as a weapon, and then all of a sudden you have a species that can insert metal blades into the hands to create a very vicious claw action. The hair on top of the head the face stayed about the same as that original monkey though, so, perhaps a well-shaven dude with claws in his hands and bending backwards at the waist is the next stage in the evolution.

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Hey, sometimes a statement of faith has a very powerful effect on your life. It can clear your thinking and allow you to move on to other issues. Let me explain. If you are back and forth, wishy washy on the existence of UFOs, Bigfoot, and the Loch Ness monster you may never get any clarity on the issue. You may always be bumbling in that gray area, looking for evidence, reading conflicting reports, having unfruitful conversations on message boards. These mysteries have the potential to consume you, especially if you can’t decide one way or the other. If you just step back and say to yourself, I’m just drawing a line in the sand and say that I believe in all three of these phenomena…so be it. Then, you know where you stand. You have a solid point of view, and you can use your brainspace for other important things like deciding who your favorite is on American Idol.

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Everybody likes the Einstein. He had style, a sense of humor, great hair, a conscience, and I hear he was also kind of smart and figured out some cool stuff that continues to help move science and technology forward. Mashup this larger than life figure with the underground graffiti stencil art movement and you have a dynamic shirt that makes you look super cool and smart and interesting and basically irresistibly desirable. Sound like something you might want? Then go ahead and plunk down your money for the Einstein Graffiti Stencil T Shirt because it’s the right thing to do for your image.

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