Bacon Makes Everything Better T-Shirt

by on July 21, 2010

Bacon is quite delicious and does make everything better: eggs, pancakes, sandwiches, macaroni, chocolate, and hamhocks. Don’t talk to me about fakin’ bacon, soy bacon, dog doodoo bacon, or whatever “substitute” meat the “health gurus” are telling you about. You need the real deal. Pig, pork, swine, the other white meat.

Actually, two problems with bacon. The hot oil spritz you get when you put you second round of bacon in the pan, and the fact that you lose about ¾ of your purchase in the cooking process. Unless, of course, you put the bacon fat to good use. Like greasing your cupcake tins (forget those ghey paper cups), or schmearing on the face of your drunk friend, who passed out in the back yard…the well-known haunt of a rabid raccoon.

I like bacon, she likes bacon, he likes bacon, and you like bacon. Celebrate this meat product with the Bacon Makes Everything Better Tshirt. Pronto.

Snorg Tees has shares in a meat processing plant, so this shirt tip toes the line dangerously close to conflict of interest. Get the lawyers ready.

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