Snorg Tees

Snorg Tees is one of the top dogs in the funny t shirt business. They consistently pump out a terrific selection of pop culture gems.

stop-being-so-negative-t-shirt

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I have no idea what I’m looking at right now. Are those college thesis papers? Bags of donated blood. What is going on? Do I have any nurses or professors in the house that can illuminate me. It’s baffling. I won’t sleep properly ’til I find out.

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raisin-cookies-are-why-i-have-trust-issues-t-shirt

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Ah, what you don’t like the healthy stuff. You need chocolate to soothe your troubled soul. Medicate the trauma of your childhood. Silence the voices whispering in your doubting moments. Man up and have a raisin cookie. Or if you exhibit decent behavior maybe you can have carob chip.

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for-a-good-time-just-add-beer-t-shirt

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Hey, some people just like to drink and have a really good time. Birds are chirping. People are laughing. Delicious food is cooked and eaten with much joy and fervor. Good times all around. Then, there are the mean drunks. This is not a shirt for those types of people. And, I’m talking to you…Dad.

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I’m pretty sure this is a smart-ass response to the excruciating movie 127 hours. James Franco’s character did not leave a note before going on a long bike/hike out in Nowhere, Utah, where he proceeded to get his arm stuck between a boulder and a cave wall. Instead of staying there to die, he cut his arm off with like a spork or something. Awful. And this shirt is sort of making fun, but also offering a very nice Public Service Announcement.

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Coffee Time T Shirt

by on December 10, 2012

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This is truly an odd one. Weird muted tones. Goofy smiles on the coffees. The stirrer is a creepy green. They’re fist bumping. There’s spillage. And, really, how often do you see a ceramic mug and a to go cup in the same room. Never, I think. Weird. Weird. Weird. I guess if you drink one at Denny’s before work, then get a Starbucks on the way to work the two liquids have a chance of meeting in your gut. Perhaps this is metaphorical.

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If you buy this shirt prior to December 21, 2012, you’re very cocky, but I like that. You’re confident you can make it through the trials and tribulations that are soon to be wrought across continents. If you do make it through…and that’s a BIG IF…you can certainly wear this tee proudly. In fact, I’d consider not ever taking it off as a sacrament of thanksgiving for life, no matter how miserable it becomes after the astroids and financial meltdowns and tidal waves and tornados.

Read more on I Survived The Mayan Apocalypse 2012 T Shirt…

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Kind of a multi-layered Bacon thing going on here. Bacon is basically the most important food on the Internet. One layer. 6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon is a game that basically suggests that everybody on earth is 6 degrees of connection or less from the actor. Meaning you know someone, who works with someone, who landscapes someone’s yard, who manages a singer-songwriter, who gets their anus bleached by Bacon’s bleacher.

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It’s Big Bang Theory and it’s practical jokes. Shelden Cooper sure can pull a zinger. Can you tell I don’t know what this is referring to and that I really don’t want to put in the 7 seconds of research to figure it out. Alas, I’m a professional. BRB.

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I like this one. The adding machine and the awkward holding of the phone. Dude’s not giving up the dream. He’s being proactive and not dressing like all the other casual jean-wearing schlubs on his floor. Good for him. You get the feeling he’s gonna make it. Actually, does it change things if that’s a broad?

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Jesus Fresco Fail T Shirt

by on November 26, 2012

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It’s enough that this shirt is called Jesus Fresco Fail. That’s funny all by itself, but wait…you get a picture too. Shephard Fairey would be proud of the attempt to shoehorn Jesus into his ubiquitous OBEY poster style.

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What’s this Murica thing all about? We’re not just highlighting the way rural folk talk are we? Something else is going on. A TV show perhaps? A cartoon from 1993. What is it? A meme with cats? Well, if it is something more, not even the Urban Dictionary knows.

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That’s some urban Vulcan shit right there. And it’s true. You gotta make sure you doin’ alright and not goin’ overboard with any whack shit. Basically, this is calling for you to see a therapist regularly to sort the innerworkings out. No stigma there. Just checkin’ yourself before you wreck yourself. Spock would approve.

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