Sex T Shirts

Sex T Shirts are those featuring innuendo, straight up sex talk, and any of the sex positions. Also, boobies figure prominently in this section.

Get This Tee From Tshirt Hell

When you are preparing to go into the club, you know that 76 percent of all the female patrons in the place will have read 50 Shades of Grey. So, this shirt is guaranteed to connect. You’ll probably have to fight women off of you just for wearing this shirt. You could be as ugly as Larry Bird, and have no game, and still this shirt will do all the work for you to get laid by your choice of fine ladies.

Read more on I Taught Christian Grey All That Shit T Shirt…

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Corn Star T Shirt

by on September 27, 2012

Get This Shirt From Five Finger Tees

Dude’s got a turtleneck, a dark beard, and light hair. And, he loves the corn on the cob. Definitely a corn star. However, unlike the porn star who has a slight tinge of guilt and self loathing in the morning, this dude is triumphant examining, closely, his bowel movement.

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Moist T Shirt

by on September 22, 2012

Get This Shirt from Bruised Bear

This is the second t-shirt I’ve seen with the word moist on it within the last 30 days. I feel a meme or movement or earth-changing experience on the horizon. Why? Because moist is a fantastic word. It’s all sexual, and gives me the willies the way it kind of glops out of your mouth. What’s not to like?

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Get This Tee from Tshirt Hell

It’s always nice to get the most famous and fabulous representatives of Scientology on the same shirt, especially when you can imply that you think both are gay, which is no problem, except that they both go out of their way to seem heterosexual (unless John loses it a little and starts soliciting the services of street-walking massuese boys). I think John would probably be the bottom in this particular coupling because Tom is an absolute force of nature.

Read more on Tom Cruise John Travolta Top Gun Bottom Gun T Shirt…

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Get This Tee From Tshirt Hell

What’s remarkable about the rock star male scientists throughout history is that they did get a lot of attention from the ladies. A guy with a mind that big, who knows how to use it can be a real turn on. Now, if you start talking about quantum physics and cats in boxes, that’s just like filling a fire hydrant with pheremones and blasting it in the room.

Read more on Schrodinger Did It for the Pussy T Shirt…

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Get This Shirt from Five Finger Tees

I guess under all the packaging it’s one naked person underneath. If we’re just talking about the shirt, generally people are wearing more than just the shirt because usually just a t-shirt doesn’t appropriately cover up everything that needs covering. But, the shirt makes sense if you consider all the clothes as the packaging with the contents being your body, which, when it doesn’t have clothes, is considered naked.

Read more on Contents One Naked Person T Shirt…

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Orgasm Donor T Shirt

by on September 16, 2012

Get This Shirt From Five Finger Tees

This is a sure winner with the ladies at the bar or party. Wear this one every chance you get, and every semi-available woman in your vicinity will feel a tingle in their thighs. By the end of the night, if you play your cards right (or even just half right), you should have your choice from among all the 7s and higher in the room. All that power from a seemingly innocuous little shirt design.

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Get This Shirt From Five Finger Tees

This here is a devious little slight of hand. You know there’s that segment of the Christian population that considers itself hardcore. They’re tough for Christ. They kick ass and take names for Jesus. They don’t mess around. They’ll jog up to you while whooping it up for the Lord because they’ll see the large lettering on your new shirt.

Read more on I’m a Hardcore Christian Grey Fan T Shirt…

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Get This Shirt from Strange Cargo

This chopper rider has got it goin’ on. Looks like his little enterprise is rewarding him well, especially in this image, because it looks like this particular passanger paid with the first currency, judging from the state of her undress. You think that dude just rides the highways and byways just looking to do business with ladies in need of rides?

Read more on Ass Gas or Grass Nobody Rides for Free T Shirt…

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Powerline Nude T Shirt

by on August 26, 2012

Get This Shirt from Strange Cargo

That is a big woman, if she’s getting all wound up in powerlines like godzilla or something. Or maybe it’s a miniature rural setting set with powerlines and that’s an anatomically correct nude woman doll. Whatever the case, it’s something to see, especially if it’s on a shirt that you proudly own.

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Get This Tee from Crack Smoking Shirts

Ah, Jonah Hill is awesome, and Superbad was funny, so why not take a quote from the movie, put it on a shirt, and where it all around town, so that people, who have not seen the movie think you’re perverted, and people that have seen the movie will think your perverted and funny and awesome. And that is definitely what you want.

Read more on Superbad I Sit Around All Day Drawing Dicks T Shirt…

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Man Whore T Shirt

by on August 18, 2012

Get This Shirt from Crack Smoking Shirts

I guess it’s true that when you say the word whore, it is automatically assumed that you’re talking about a woman. I’m not saying it’s right, but it is, so if indeed you are a man whore and want to let the world know it’s good to have the qualifier on the tee. Plus, if you walked around with a shirt with the word whore on it, woman might think it’s directed at them. Men would never think you’re calling them a man whore without good reason, like maybe the dude had sexual relations with your girlfriend, mom, and sister.

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