Random T Shirts

Random T Shirts: If I find myself wondering how I’m going to tag a shirt, it usually winds up in the random tee pile.

This little step-by-step instruction sheet is a perfect little representation of those assembly instructions in multiple language or no language as it were, that skips like 14 steps in putting to together the item you were so eager to receive from the UPS guy. First you look at it and you’re totally overwhelmed. Next, you go back to it, because you want this item assembled and working NOW. You tell yourself you can do it…one step at a time.

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NASA Nerd T Shirt

by on June 7, 2011

That’s the NASA logo with the word Nerd in it. Are NASA people really nerds? I guess so. It feels like pilots maybe aren’t that nerdy, but I suppose scientists are. I have been reading James Michener’s Space for about 7 and a half months. I’m almost done! But, it’s a little bit of historical fiction covering the build up of the Space program. Kind of interesting.

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This shirt is a little rapey, but if it involves that police it must be OK. Right? Actually, is this considered impersonating an officer? Can you get in trouble for wearing this? I guess that’s the risk you take when you wear Police Lay Flat On Your Back and Spread ‘Em T Shirt. Because the reward potential is also very high. If you pass by the right girl at the right time in her dating life and/or buzzed state and/or horniness level, you just might score with such a blunt offensive shirt.

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Cholesterol does get a bad rap in a lot of ways. There is good cholesterol and bad cholesterol. Eggs especially get a bad wrap, but you can eat them daily and produce positive effects on your cholesterol levels. You’ll notice there are eggs with yolks on this Cholesterol A Fancy Word for Flavor T Shirt.

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Police are starting to crack down on those crazy crotch rocket speeders. Too many lives have been put in danger by these speeder bikes, too much carnage. The police got top-of-the-line bikes, spent three months planning the best way to round up the red and blue bikes, and put their plan in action today as you can see. This Tron Police Roundup T Shirt portrays a great day in gamer law enforcement.

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Squeeze all the biggie internet memes into one succinct Zombie Pirate Ninja T Shirt. It’s a real time saver when you’re at the get-together or in a bar and you’re trying to strike up conversation, and you’re starting to list off all the things you like. You can just point to the tee and everything is quite clear.

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Where to begin with this one. Lots of stuff going on. You have the Android robot icon symbol logo, looking a helluva lot like R2D2, and he’s projecting an Apple logo that looks strikingly like the Death Star. Basically, bringing the fight between good and evil in the epic Star Wars movies to the street level fight between Mobile Operating Systems. Not sure it’s going to be to the death, but Google and Apple are certainly trading powerful blows, which, of course, is ultimately good for the consumer, just like the epic Star Wars struggle was good entertainment.

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Those creepy twins walking down the hall, guess it’s not their fault they were murdered and can’t seem to find their way to the light, so they hang in limbo and haunt the halls of the hotel. God axe murder is such a messy affair. If you’re a beer and horror fan, then you probably must own this Doppelganger Double Stout T Shirt, because it speaks deeply to you on so many levels and allows you to show others where you’re coming from. Who cares if you scare away 95% of the people you come into contact with. It’s that other 5% of deep bonding and friendship that makes wearing this tee totally worthwhile.

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Normally with these Delorean Dashboard T Shirts you get a special date that signifies something or spells boobies upside down, but here nothing is dawning on me. Does anyone know if the dates chosen here mean something. I’m sure they probably do and I’m being totally dense and that’s sad, and the only way to brighten up that rain cloud is to buy the shirt because you love that Back to the Future franchise.

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Hey, I’m from Milwaukee…this is like the essence of the city right here. You’ve seen the sausage races at Miller Park during Brewer’s games. One of those weenies is a bratwurst. And in this particular image on the First is the Wurst T Shirt, we have the brat winning as it should because it’s the best. Of course, I’m going to be exiled from the city for saying the following: I love Whole Foods turkey brats. They are good. No lie.

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Nice little wordplay switch up on the old ass commercial for those toaster waffles that, in retrospect, were probably nasty as all get out. Wait, they probably still sell those damn things on the strength of that tagline: leggo my eggo. By the way, who the hell tries to steal someone’s waffle in the morning. That ain’t cool.

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Love the image of the girl with the rocker hand gesture and a beer in the other hand. She’s not crabby, she’s rockin’ out on good vibes, great times, good food, and plentiful libations. Is there anything better than that. I didn’t think so. And, that is why you should make sure there’s always coolness in the room, and things don’t slip into silly bitterness, by wearing the Don’t Be Crabby T Shirt.

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