
Benjamin Franklin totally owns Teddy Roosevelt by sneaking in the picture and workin’ the rabbit ears and proving that he has cooties and perhaps even 27 degrees of nerdiness. Now, you can only see this view of Mt. Rushmore in the perfect storm of conditions. New moon. Under 28 degrees. Over 58% humidity and, of course, super-freakin’ high on acid tabs.
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It comes down to bein’ yourself. Doing what your heart tells you to do. Not takin’ it from the man. Takin’ it to the stage or the street. Speakin’ troof. And, of course, keepin’ it real. I actually can’t wear this tshirt yet, because I only have a green belt in keepin’ it real, but I go to the dojo of realness daily workin’ on my skills.
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So…there was this sunny day in May and all these freaks and geeks, who used to hang out together, ‘cuz they all looked whack in some way or other, like they were the main characters in the latest Palaniuk tome. Anyway, they all decided to go into the fun house, which sat on a dusty lot in the middle of the fair on the outskirts of town.
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This is funny. It’s almost too cute, but treads that fine line between terrific humor and smarmy bullshit. And, plus, it’s funny because it’s true. From cradle to rock ‘n roll to rocking chair. Ah, the never-ending cycle of life.
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Really, this shouldn’t be a source of constant hilarity to me. Really, if I was decent, this would be a sad commentary on the environmental crisis we’re up against. It may be convenient, it may have been the next big thing in The Graduate, but plastics are really nasty.
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I can never keep these little cavely wonders straight, and I’m sure you can’t either unless you’re some kind of superhero geologist. Thank god someone thought to put the up and down formations on a shirt announcing who they are.
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This is God’s honest truth. I was just at Cempazuchi on Brady St. on the eastside of Milwaukee and couldn’t of had a more boring looking plate. A white flour wrapper with a squiggly line of sour cream drizzled on top. But, looks are not why you order a tinga burrito in the best Mexican food restaurant in Milwaukee. You order it for the taste and to fill you up.
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There’s no better way to describe the manly love that inevitably arises between men in the sporting context. I imagine it’s the same on the battlefield, and it manifests itself in the chest bump, low five, high five, the butt slap, and the composition of sweet little reminders of how much the other person means (on cute flowery stationary).
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Daily affirmations are big time helpful for achieving your goals, becoming the person you want to be and improving your outlook on life. Want to get out of the caustic, negative, sarcastic rut? Get yourself a tshirt that says something nice about you. Oh, and get a full length mirror that you can look in about 764 times a day just to keep the good times rolling.
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There’s nothing more sinister than an innocent looking kid cheating at dreidel. I mean you have to be a pretty sophisticated grifter to successfully cheat at the spinning top game, which means there are well-funded, state-of-the-art dreidel cheating cartels out there. And, that, my friends, is very scary.
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