Random T Shirts

Random T Shirts: If I find myself wondering how I’m going to tag a shirt, it usually winds up in the random tee pile.

Sheepzilla Takes Tokyo

by on November 22, 2009

I dig the original, hand-painted designs of this sheepzilla cat. Really funky looking stuff, like…

grandpa-bunny-tshirtGrandpa Bunny – Looks a little like the Grinch with a weirdo bunny hat, which is pretty much what happened to the Grinch once he lost his evil mojo. He had that one wonderful Christmas, then became a sad lost soul, wearing a weird bunny hat that he probably stole back in the good ol’ days.

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Milk Mustache T Shirt

by on November 17, 2009

milk-mustache-teeHey lookie there. That glass of milk has a mustache, and a top hat, and cane, and spats, and smug look of satisfaction about being so dapper. Admit it, you’d be feeling pretty dang smug if you looked that sharp, especially that painstakenly groomed ‘stash.

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i-wish-i-hadnt-gone-to-a-liberal-arts-college-teeIt’s alright if you own the place, selling millions of natural bristle fiber broom units. But, if you’re the sucker in the room making $9.65 an hour, bundling up the flax straw, then you’re probably second-guessin’ that Art Appreciation bachelors.

Read more on I Wish I Hadn’t Gone to a Liberal Arts College T shirt…

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college-tshirtIf it’s good enough for Bluto, it’s good enough for me and you. You know Animal House was the original cinematic college farce, chronicling the absolutely off the hook antics of John “Bluto” Blutarsky and the Delta Tau Chi house. This shirt is a sublime shout out to this awesome movie and stands alone as funny. Forget ASU, UT, U of M and all those pedestrian halls of higher learning, celebrate college in the collective sense, ‘cuz it’s awesome.

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lets-get-fucked-up-like-the-economy-tshirtYou wear this little gem out drinkin’ and you’re going to have a commiseration party six deep. People just moanin’ into there cheap as shit cans of bear, talkin’ about lost jobs, more expensive health benefits, plummeting 401Ks, and a world-wide epidemic of less soft Pima cotton.

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hopeless-romantic-seeks-filthy-whore-teeIt’s very important to be totally honest with your hopes and desires and the definition of yourself. Especially as it pertains to relationships. I mean you could try to paint this relationship seeking ad in a different light, but, really, you’ll never get what you want until you go ahead and name what you want in no uncertain terms. The universe is abundant. The universe will graciously provide all the filthy whores you can handle.

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i-hope-i-dont-black-out-because-this-is-awesome-tshirtThis is always what I think when I’m doing my nightly auto-erotic asphyxiation routine. I mean Michael Hutchence and David Carradine knew how to party to the edge of consciousness…well except for the one time each of them took it a little far. Oops. Totally worth it though. Anyway, I guess some people may think of those times when they’re so hyped, they start chuggin’ Hornitos straight from the bottle, because that too is always awesome.

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straight-teeHappy Halloween!

If you’re gay, this is a great costume. Plus, it’s straight funny. The homosexuals did sort of commandeer the rainbow, which is a pretty cool design. Back in the days of Harvey Milk, they took to the streets with a new flag. It banded them together, gave them strength, and left all the non-homosexuals with no choice but to be much more drab in our color selection.

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Don’t Curse Tshirt

by on October 28, 2009

dont-curse-tshirtI love the tee shirts where it looks like the wearer is a saint or do-gooder douche bag, so there’s a pre-judgment (that’s like redundant judgment). Then, if the observer comes close despite their aversion to the douche baggery, they all of a sudden find themselves within six inches of satan spawn. This, my friends, is perceptual gymnastics and not for the faint of heart. This is like jumping in the pool in winter after just slipping out of the jacuzzi. Shocker. Big time. I mean this shirt has the word “muff” on it.

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zebrah-llama-goat-teeThis blog isn’t about the more arty world of tshirts, but I need to point out the NONOLOA Collective, ‘cuz they got some crazy, wild, eye-popping, soul-shakin’ designs, comin’ at you from the street level.

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lets-ruin-something-with-advertising-shirtAdvertising ain’t easy. What, with all this negative Nancy, wu wu, new age, liberal love for “pristine, unmolested” nature. Face it. That’s just a pipe dream. Look at that canyon on this shirt and ask yourself honestly, would it not look 57% better with a billboard right about where that dude is standing.

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ask-me-about-my-complete-lack-of-interest-tshirtNo seriously. If you’re going to a party filled with celebrities, artists, musicians and fuckin’ hotties, then you probably don’t need to wear this. Because those people make the world go ’round. But, if it’s a stodgy gathering of Nobel Prize winners and the top 10 speakers at TED, then you probably want to have this shirt on hand to show them what’s what.

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