Random T Shirts

Random T Shirts: If I find myself wondering how I’m going to tag a shirt, it usually winds up in the random tee pile.

A shout out to what many feel is the greatest game of all time: Legend of Zelda.

I like this shirt because it works on a couple of levels. It pleases the most geeky among us, because what’s more nerdy than playing Legend of Zelda in your mom’s basement 12 hours a night. But, it also appeals to those that are into high level business dealing where the operative phrase is “make it rain,” as in work the network, burn up the phones, make the back room deals, bring in the business, and put cash in the coffers.

Read more on Make It Rain Legend of Zelda Song of Storms Tshirt…

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I’m moving to New York City, and I’m riding the subway every day, just to use the wireless. I’ll totally Tweet that I’m on the NYC subway 5 times a day. Then, I’ll do snarky little Facebook postings about how smelly or weird looking the people next to me are. I’m pumped for wireless in the NYC subway system.

Read more on NYC Subway to Get Wireless…


This here is another super fantastic tshirt. The good ol’ Statue of Liberty has put on a few LB’s, and it’s easy to see why. Too much fried chicken. Too many desserts. And she never really gets any exercise. Kind of just stands there all the time. There’s probably not a better welcome to Ellis Island for foreigners trying to immigrate her than the super fat Ms. Liberty.

Read more on Fat America Statue of Liberty T-shirt…


Justin Bieber just put Omaha on the map baby, ‘cuz that shitty town wasn’t even on a map before Bieber dropped his masterpiece song, and now Omaha Mall is trending on Twitter. Nebraska is proud. And you can look it up too. Take any atlas printed before Justin put out his song this yesterday or last week or last month or whatever, and there is not any mention of Omaha, NE. Now, look at the continually updated Google maps or that Rand McNally’s that came off the presses this morning and it’s totally there.

Read more on Newsflash: Omaha Mall Trending on Twitter…


I’m a couple three weeks late on this, but Chris Kaman buying $10,000 worth of fireworks and lighting them off in what looks to be a quiet suburban cul de sac is definitely worth a look-see.

Read more on Chris Kaman Lights Up Western Michigan…


Even Jenny McCarthy and her new 24-year-old Internet Marketing Coordinator boyfriend have to approve of this vaccine. Give it to ’em early and often is what I say. What would happen if we all didn’t take drugs. It would be a fuckin’ miserable world is what I’m telling you and we’d suffer from a massive epidemic of bored assholes screwin’ stuff up for the rest of us. So, don’t give us that Big PharmaColumbia wants to stick our babies with as many needles as possible simply for the profit. Don’t tell me heroine, speed, Ecstasy, and Adderall will give us autism.

Read more on Drugs The Boredom Vaccine T-shirt…


This shirt has everything you need. Great Pyramid of Giza in Egypt, a transitive pictograph verbalization, Paris, and, of course, misdirection, because there isn’t a pyramid of note in Paris.

If you’re a fufu Frenchie, a mason, or a crazy, whacky, wonderful tshirt designer, then as a professional, you’ll need to pick up this I Love Paris Pictograph Pyramid Tshirt.

Read more on I Love Paris Pictograph Pyramid Tshirt…


Yep. That’s right Chelsea Clinton is getting married, so all you men hoping to woo President Clinton’s little darling, you’re out of luck. Go cry your eyes out in the closet and…Get. Over. It. The well-known beauty is marrying some investment banker named Marc Mezvinsky, who probably stole taxpayer money and old people’s retirements in the banking free for all we’re still suffering from. Or maybe he was one of the good ones…ha ha ha. Good ones…that’s a good one. Anyway, maybe Chelsea has a great personality, because she seems to have Hilary’s pastiness and Bill’s misshapen nose. Nonetheless, let’s celebrate for the couple as they scrape together a couple three million greenbacks to throw a suitable wedding.

Read more on Sorry Boys Chelsea’s Off the Market…


Damn. Dude could of parked in downtown Chicago with their bend over privately operated parking meters and still come out ahead on this deal. Of course, he won the lawsuit over the home owner’s association and will be reimbursed the legal fees that have incurred over the several year-long court battle to park his truck in his driveway.

Read more on Man spends $200K to park in his driveway…


Stop the fuckin’ presses. Megan Fox goes outside without makeup. Holy bejeezus can the Transformers geeks even handle it. She sort of doesn’t even look totally plastic. In fact, she looks pretty great, except for those rainbow, plucked to within a whisker of their death eyebrows. Dude, she also just has her hair down without any fancy shit and she has a scrape on her right elbow.

Read more on Megan Fox goes to lunch without makeup…


Hey, from the get I’m going to tell the kids out there that suicide is bad for your health, so think long and hard before you do it, and get some advice from an adult that you trust, like that dude that posts on the Legend of Zelda message board all day. He’s wise. You’ll be in good hands in terms of making the right decision.

Read more on Suicide Watch T-Shirt…

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Hey, who let the cat out of the bag. I’ve been basically printing money with this “business” for years. All it involves is a decent point and shoot camera, a 19-year old buxom blonde with a slight lisp, and any number of horny middle aged men driving sporty red vehicles.

Read more on Blackmail The Hobby That Pays T-Shirt…