Headline Shirts is wildly awesome

Headline Shirts is the best in the business at delivering absurd, entertaining and hilarious tees. You definitely want to check out these reviews.

Or you might want to take a look at the top 22 Headline Shirts according to me.

This is a highly charged political statement dressed up as a benign little spinner game of chance. It’s like a twister spinner, or some other game with colorful pieces a child would play, except that there are countries with real people, real lives, and a real aversion to having the United States insert “democracy” into their behinds in the name of “freedom.”

Read more on Which Country Should We Screw Next T Shirt…


ASCII Zebra T Shirt

by on January 31, 2011

You can’t see it in this image of the shirt, because I wanted to give you a female modeling the shirt, but that really is one of those ASCII art dealios, where people with way too much time on their hands create pieces of art with typing. There are capital I’s and 7’s and colons and those little squiggles, and equal signs, and  pluses and question marks. No lie. This probably took someone like 890 hours to figure out. Then Headline Shirts probably found it on the Internet and said “hey, cool and just copied and pasted and voila…cool ASCII Zebra T Shirt.

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This is just a cool looking shirt. Han Solo was always cool. Harrison Ford was handsome and he had a bit of caustic wit and he always did it his way. Combine that with a weird and so shallow he was deep Andy Warhol and you have an amazing collision of substance and style and pop culture. I almost feel like if too many people wear this Double Solo Warhol T Shirt it may create an pop culture vortex that will suck up any and all that enjoy movies, music, and television…and viral Youtube videos. Almost like the Second Coming of Christ, except instead of Christians being whisked away it’s entertainment addicts.

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Reason number 974 that I love the Internet. The amazingly random pop culture personalities that get picked up and turned into cultural icons and Internet memes. Chuck Norris is in the pantheon. The name Chuck Norris conjures an indestructible, undefeatable, super man. But, he’s not a super hero, because that’s cheap. He is a man with incredible will, strength, stamina, intellect, and raw gravitas, rolled up into a hairy red-headed hero package.

Read more on Chuck Norris Talk to Chuck T Shirt…


Gotta like the high tech analog technology and duct tape the National Security Agency uses to  record incriminating evidence. These days you gotta keep on your toes at all times. Anybody could be wired. If you see a big bulge on the chest of your son, co-worker, the pizza delivery man, or your gramma. Pat them down. Take them to the ground if they show even a hint of hesitancy. This ain’t no playing around. The NSA ain’t nothing to mess with. The could put you in a cell to rot for a good long time if you don’t watch your back.

Read more on Please Talk Clearly Into My Chest NSA Tape Recorder T Shirt…


The 80s were indeed pretty awesome. Feathered hair. Mullets. Pastel colors. Popped collars. Top siders. Horrible movies. Synthesizers. Soprano saxophone. The Cold War with two super powers, instead all this anybody could be a terrorist shit. Pants that sat very high on the hips. Aerobics classes with lycra and leg warmers. And, everything was shallow.

Read more on I Heart Hammer and Sickle the 80s T Shirt…


SF City Bus Muni T Shirt

by on December 11, 2010

Sounds like the San Francisco bus system is a lot like the Milwaukee bus system, except that I think the fair is twice as much in Milwaukee if you can believe that shit. Again, if you want to look like you know San Francisco. I mean really know San Francisco. You do not get a shirt featuring the Golden Gate Bridge, or Fisherman’s Wharf, Lombard Street, Gay Pride parade or even the trolley. No you get this SF City Bus Muni T Shirt featuring the Fillmore bus running over all kinds of stuff.

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I have a few things I want to talk about regarding this t shirt. One, I heart transitive pictograph verbalizations…you know the thing that started with I picture of a fake heart NY. Think that that started to spread to other locales, then the Internet really took it to another level where artists started adding other distinguishing factors about the place they love and making that the image that represents love. That is the case I’m making for putting this shirt in the Internet Meme category. The convention is quite ingenious and it really does disseminate a lot of information about a place and the people that reside in it.

Read more on I Love San Francisco T Shirt…


Baboons Typing T Shirt

by on December 10, 2010

This is the OB (Original Baboon) when it comes to Headline Shirts. This is like the start of it all, and I know that because this is the logo of the lovely little shirt retailer from San Francisco. It’s a great logo, because when pigs fly and baboons type Shakespearean sonnets, I’ll be out here by morning. Know what I’m saying? Do you smell the literary baboon steak I’m cookin’ over here. I thought you did and if you didn’t you wouldn’t be here. That’s how it works in this big crazy world. Everything comes down to you reading this and making that one decision:

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Seven Deadly Sins T Shirt

by on December 10, 2010

Okay, I guess you can’t really analyze this shirt without pulling out the seven deadly sins and going over them one at a time. But first, according to www.deadlysins.com:

“The Seven Deadly Sins are those transgressions which are fatal to spiritual progress. You probably commit some of them every day without thinking about the rich tradition of eternal damnation in which you’re participating.”

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I think this is how they describe the hipsters cruising around the Mission District with a smart phone in one hand and a coffee in the other. Bonus points if you’re riding a bike hands free while holding the coffee and engaging deeply in a conversation. Three bonus points if you are texting. And even more points and adulation if you’re wearing sunglasses, Vans, and a scarf. Cool?

Read more on San Francisco Mission Taco T Shirt…


Top Gun Goose T Shirt

by on December 9, 2010

It’s sad as shit when Goose dies in Top Gun, and Tom Cruise, as Maverick, emotes the hell out of the scene when he’s mourning the passing of his wing buddy. In fact, it’s getting a little dusty in here as I type this.

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