Five Finger Tees Reviewed

Five Finger Tees: They’re a steal and the designs are cool, and I review them as they release new ones each week.

Zach Galifianakis…my mancrush. I mean not in that way, but God I do love him like we had a short-lived passionate affair…no no not like that…you don’t understand.

He makes me laugh uncontrollably with his wackydoodle, beard stomp. And, I’ll blow anyone that makes me lose control like that. But, not blow in the sense like your dirty mind thinks I mean. I’m talking blow smoke up the rear, as I write a review of a t-shirt that quotes one of his lines in one of his comedy movies, of which he has made many. In fact, it’s in his contract that he must be in a third of all movies made from 2007 to 2015, so you’re gonna get your fill and still want more of ZG.

Read more on The Hangover 2 I’m a Stay at Home Son T Shirt…


I Llike Llamas T Shirt

by on October 11, 2011

Solid little wordplay right here for sure. If you indeed do like llamas, then the I Llike Llamas T Shirt is going to be a no brainer purchase. They do have a bit of a stateliness that is attractive in a four-legged creature. Plus, they are called something with two lls to start the word, which is unique. Do you get wool from llamas? And can you pack them with cargo and cross a large expanse of rugged terrain? I’m sure there are many, many reasons to like the llamas, which is why Five Finger Tees took it upon themselves to get this shirt done.

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Well, of course it had to happen: Steve Jobs t shirts. God rest his soul. I was never an Apple fanboy, but I do appreciate the innovation, so I have much respect. And, I guess, I probably couldn’t live very well without my iPod Touch, so maybe I’m slightly a fan.

Read more on Steve Jobs 1955-2011 T Shirt…


Of course you like Eastbound and Down and Kenny Powers, and even if his temperment wasn’t suited for the U.S. leagues, the latent pitching skills always enable him to land on his feet. He’s pitching in Mexico for Charros, still sporting the power number 55.

Read more on Eastbound and Down Kenny Powers Charros T Shirt…


Hey…who wants to be super classy? I know you do! That’s why I offer up the See You Tomorrow Corn T Shirt for your classy pleasure. You will impress EVERYBODY, because you have a smiling ear of corn on your shirt, then they’ll just be overwhelmed with admiration of how much of a class act you are as it slowly begins to dawn on them that that corn is going to see you tomorrow in your shit. It’s the sort of a ha moment that gets spiritual gurus laid…a lot.

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Robert Rodriguez is to be commended for his film From Dusk ‘Til Dawn, and what better way than but an unofficial shirt celebrating that den of evil that was Titty Twisters. I mean that place was off the chain wild and gruesome. Jim Brown, zombies, and Salma Hayek looking devilishly fine is an absolute recipe for disaster in sort of looked like the end of times once the shit really started to go down.

Read more on From Dusk Til Dawn Titty Twister T Shirt…


Mel Brooks plays the wise Yoda character in the sci-fi spoof Spaceballs. His catch phrase is may the Schwartz Be With You, rather than Yoda’s May the Force Be With You. Get it?

Read more on Spaceballs May the Schwartz Be With You T Shirt…


Three simple rules:

1. Never underestimate your opponent…expect the unexpected (wait was that one or two rules)
2. Take it outside. Never start anything inside the bar unless it’s absolutely necessary.
3. Be nice.

Read more on Road House Double Duece T Shirt…


More human than human. Love that tagline. Blade Runner…good movie? Not so good? Harrison Ford…good actor? Not so good? I actually liked Blade Runner and Ford’s work in the film, which is why I highly recommend the Tyrell Genetic Replicants T Shirt.

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This movie, BeetleJuice, was a Tim Burton classic back in the day with Michael Keaton, Winona Ryder and some other actors that you may have heard of but I don’t have the time to look up on IMDB. Of course, you probably weren’t alive in 1988, so you may not have seen it or be aware of it. Of course, I thought that about Back to the Future and everybody in the world is in love with that one, so this could be a timeless classic as well. I just have no idea because I don’t leave the house and actually speak to anybody, especially not the youth of today.

Read more on BeetleJuice Betelguese T Shirt…

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Meh T Shirt

by on August 25, 2011

If you really want to shout to the world that you are unimpressed, then you need to get this Meh T Shirt. People will see that and totally think to themselves, man that person thinks all the shit going down up in here is luke warm at best. Then, they’ll have a slight panic thinking it might be a comment about their personality, but they’ll get over that quickly when you give them all the loving they could possibly need on a Wednesday.

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Walter White’s alter ego in the TV show Breaking Bad. But, you know that. Was an unassuming science teacher, but got some cancer and decided to sell meth. I think I missed a few things in there, but he also started to use the psuedonym Heisenberg, as in a tribute to Uncertainty principle science genious Werner Heisenberg.

Read more on Helium Breaking Bad Heisenberg T Shirt…