Drug T Shirts: Yay for drugs!

Drug T Shirts: Caffeine, marijuana, and the nasty stuff are featured on these mind-altering tees.

Is that Drew Barrymore…if so she’s come a long way from those days as Gerdie in ET. Can you believe how small and cute she is in that movie. And now she’s portrayed on this Cocaine and Cigs T Shirt and marrying and divorcing Tom Green, and showing her rack to David Letterman, and directing pretty decent films. And still being cute.

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Mom Says High T Shirt

by on March 29, 2011

Mom is from the fifties and she’s smoking a joint and she has that pointy nose and high cheekbones that all white moms in the 50s had in the United States. And, she doesn’t care if you or your friends see her lighting up doobies because she’s liberated. Your Dad left her two months ago and at first it was hard, because your whole identity gets wrapped up in relationship, but when it breaks off abruptly, especially the way this one did (young cocktail waitress, trip to Mexico, lies, deceit, and an obvious charge on the credit card statement at the local adult “toys” shop. Well, it sped up Mom’s process. She immediately started to let deep feelings rule, and one of the new things she tried that has made it into consistent rotation in her life is getting high. Good for her.

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Hey, look someone finally captured the duty of coverage the ATF has been entrusted to. And, now they finally have a new logo that aligns with the hard living shit they deal with on a daily basis. I guess my only question is where are the drugs and the gambling. I feel like that should be in the ATF wheelhouse as well. Skip the cult stuff…like the David Koresh fiasco in Corpus Christi, TX a few years (decades??) back, and give me some drugs and gambling.

Read more on The Bureau of Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms T Shirt…


The Alice in Wonderland crew are blitzed out of the their minds right here. Alice, who’s looking mighty fine on this shirt I must say, is taking her turn on the hookah, but somebody loaded that thing with hashish instead of tobacco or herbs or whatever people load up hookahs with in legal establishments. Caterpillar dude, card dude, the cat, and the rabbit are all stupefied, blissed out, out of their minds. Alice is seeing life changing visions, which so won’t see in the morning. I’m just happy that they’re all having pleasant trips. No paranoia in the bunch. Maybe someone else already ran off into the woods screaming about devil carpenter ants the size of bars of soap.

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Someone told me that they saw Charlie Sheen get up at like 5:30 AM and workout hard with a personal trainer. And, he has a 6-pack. WTF. Maybe he is the ultimate winner. Maybe he can party with the best of celebrities past. Maybe he can do the weekly coke binges and raucous threesomes forever.  Then, again, his face looks like misery wrapped in shit, so maybe the piper is coming to collect sooner than we think. And, oh, won’t we all feel so proud to  have egged him on and even celebrated him with stuff like this Team Sheen T Shirt.

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Apparently, good ol’ Charlie Sheen has gone off the deep end. Either that or he’s shed the ties that bind and is now letting his freak flag fly. Cocaine and hooker binges. Kind of trite, but I’m going to give him a pass. I really think this was just a ruse to get the hell out of his contract with that tepid TV show 2 And a Half Men. Who wants to be associated with that mediocre drivel. And, don’t tell me it’s the highest rated show in the history of the world. So what. Whoever said popular taste was worth a damn.

Read more on I’m On a Drug It’s Called Charlie Sheen T Shirt…


Love this shirt, especially on Valentine’s Day. She’s out there on the veranda thinking to herself, what the fuck did I get into, Jesus is all I need. Forget that I need a man, and scissoring once a month when the Mother Superior is away ain’t cuttin’ it. Thank God for these damn butts or I don’t think I could uphold the the Mother Mary tradition up in here.

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Live a Little T Shirt

by on February 15, 2011

This shirt needs absolutely no explanation because it is farkin’ hilarious from the get. You know what I’m going to do to honor the brilliance of this Live a Little T Shirt? I’m going to list every little thing that shows up in its grid of awesomeness.

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Just like my gramma used to do. Get up early…old people can’t help it because they go to bed at like 5:30 PM because they have nothing to do, so they get up at about 2 AM and start pottering around the house. Gramma would roll out the dough and shape it into perfectly round cinnamon rolls. Ah, the days we used to stay at her house were grand. I’d get up at 10 AM and there would be the perfect breakfast.

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If you have seen the show, Arrested Development, with Will Arnett starring as Gob Bluth, then you know what’s going on with this pill bottle. Gob does magic badly. He rides a Segway and he says Come on a lot. What’s not to like about the dude? Plus, he was a major star on the best show to ever get canceled way before its time: Arrested Development.

Read more on Arrested Development Forget Me Now Gob Bluth T Shirt…


Seven Deadly Sins T Shirt

by on December 10, 2010

Okay, I guess you can’t really analyze this shirt without pulling out the seven deadly sins and going over them one at a time. But first, according to www.deadlysins.com:

“The Seven Deadly Sins are those transgressions which are fatal to spiritual progress. You probably commit some of them every day without thinking about the rich tradition of eternal damnation in which you’re participating.”

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Of course, Rick said cocaine is a helluva drug with that little c