Animal T Shirts: Your favorite beasts on tees

Animal T Shirts: If the shirt features an animal and it’s funny or cool, it’s been reviewed here.

I’m assuming this is a shout out to King Kong, but that wasn’t really an invasion. He was captured and ripped out of his home and taken to NYC, and he got away, scaled the Empire State Building and ended up falling to the ground after fighting fighter planes. Sad. Ooops that was a spoiler alert. Hopefully, you already know this story, which is at least 78 years old, and probably older. The first King Kong movie was released in 1933.

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Have you seen The Hangover 2? I have not, but I loved the fixed one and I love the previews I’m seeing for II. In fact, this scene with Alan Garner and a monkey on a crowded Asian bus, sitting next to an old man looks hilarious.

Read more on The Hangover II When a Monkey Nibbles on a Weenis It’s Funny in Any Language T Shirt…


Seems so cute. The picture of the goat is cute. The girl is cute. Nice sweet little shirt. In fact, you may even want to get it for a sweet little kid. But, if you remember a few years, Goatse Farm was an Internet meme. Basically, it was saying do you want to see Goatse Farms and it sounds idyllic so you click the link and the most horrific shock site was there awaiting you. And you projectile vomited on your screen. And cried for two hours straight and scrubbed your eyeballs with soft hand soap to no avail.

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Hedgehog Looking SharpVery cute little hedgehog looking in the mirror and giving himself positive affirmations. Of course, you also have wordplay here, because hedgehogs spiny little rodents (not sure if they’re a rodent…probably not actually). And, spines are sharp, thus this says Hedgehog Looking Sharp T Shirt.

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What you have here is Sasquatch or Big Foot riding a skateboard with a red, white and blue headband, which recalls the halcyon days of tennis when Bjorn Borg ruled. He had long hippie 70s hair and a scraggly beard and battled with McEnroe and Connors. He won some of the biggies and he was hairy and why PalmerCash has combined the tennis player, and skateboarding and Big Foot is a big mystery that I have no idea where to start unraveling.

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This is absolutely an epic battle, and you can have it on your chest to show everybody that you do not have time for irony. You are solely on this earth to be sincere, to honor the sacred, and to contemplate which wild creatures would win in fights. If this describes where you feel you would like to be in your life all you have to do is get out your credit card, buy the Shark Versus Bear T Shirt, wait a few days for shipping, then put the thing on.

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No idea what this means, and God that duck with the tear drop is super, super sad. Why do you want to wear a Poor Little Duck T Shirt? I’ll tell you why. Because it is super random and kind of cute and is a spectacular conversation starter. Want to get in somebody’s pants? Move close enough, so they can see the shirt and let it work its magic, trigger all sorts of emotions. Follow up and sincerely ask the tee means to them.

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This is one of those optical illusions. People are going to pass by you on the street, see that animal clawing at your chest and jump back in fright, thinking that you’re getting ripped to pieces by a mini black and white tiger. This is priceless entertainment, which is why I recommend that you buy this Tiger Uppercut T Shirt no matter how much 604 Republic sells it for.

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There’s a shark coming out of the book, which makes this Reading is Jawesome T Shirt spectacular and an excellent message for the kids. Unless they’re complete tards and think that all books are pop ups with sharks, then they’ll just be disappointed when they get their hands on a Roald Dahl book and there are no pop up sharks. Then they’ll feel like they’ve been deceived, crusade against reading, and never crack a book open again.

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Wordplay. Right here. I’m tellin’ ya. It’s wordplay all up in here. Too Err is Human To Moo is Bovine T Shirt totally twists around the original Too Err is Human To Forgive is Divine. Or is it Too Err is Human to Err again shame on me. I forget, but this tee inserts a cow, and references cow language “moo” and uses the Latin name for the cow “bovine” so you know it’s pretty powerfully absurd and awesome.

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Birds T Shirt

by on May 16, 2011

I don’t think this Birds T Shirt is referencing the horror film directed by Alfred Hitchcock, but I guess you can’t be sure. It doesn’t feel as creepy and scary as that movie. Those birds don’t seem to be after anybody, but maybe that’s the kind of thinking that got the people in the movie in trouble. At first it was like oh look at that cute bird to oh my that’s quite an impressive flock of birds to oh my god that gaggle of birds is attacking me and I’m missing an eye. So, be careful with this tee. It might be the beginning of something dastardly. You never can tell.

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Jeeves 3000 T Shirt

by on May 14, 2011

Jeeves 3000 seems to be the coolest robot ever. Jeeves is a name for a butler, so this robot performs the butler duties like answering your door and polishing your silver, but he also cars for your small pets, goldfish and gerbil, makes the food, brings you drinks with umbrellas, cleans the windows, takes out the trash, sweeps the floor, vacuums the floor, puts the baby down for a nap, and walks the dog. Very versatile. Very efficient. Very worth the money, when you think of all the help it replaces. Of course, this thing is not for sale to the public because only a prototype has been built. Rumor has it a servant robot like this will cost upwards of $500,000, so you have to be in the upper crust of society to afford one.

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