Someone did not get the Christmas story when they were younger, so when they heard a prowler on the roof they were ready. Now, everything is ruined, all because Santa messed with the wrong house. Of course, what I really want to know is what taxidermist went ahead and mounted Donner, Blitzen and Santa Claus? Was this a back alley job? Is there a black market for highly inappropriate stuffing? These are the things that get stirred up when I see this No Christmas T Shirt.
Santa
Here’s a good one for all you kiddies out there. Get over the lie. Embrace the truth. Move on with your life. Get the Santa I Don’t Exist T Shirt because it’s the brutal truth, it’s funny, and Santa is flippin’ the bird, which is something you don’t see everyday, unless the world makes it to the future as seen in Idiocracy. Then you probably will see that everyday…
Hey, if you’re on the hook for millions of kids’ happiness every year, you’re gonna need a little somethin’ somethin’ to take the edge off. Am I right? And, if you’re a larger than life personality like Santa, a little weed or Valium is not enough. So, give him a break, and cut the cookies and milk crap. Leave him something that will really do him some good.
This is a terrible shirt. How can the designer of this I Don’t Exist Santa T Shirt live with herself? What about the children? What kind of existential questions is this thing gonna bring up their impressionable minds that aren’t ready for such mortal struggle.
You’re probably wondering why this Xmas T shirt now. You’re probably just now getting over the hustle and bustle of the holidays and trying to settle into 2011 and getting back into the groove. Well, you can’t ever forget about being on the right side of the Santa ledger by being more nice than naughty. It’s a good message to carry with you throughout the year. Maybe I’ll do a Christmas T Shirt review every month. I mean Snorg Tees makes this It’s the Most Wonderful Time for a Beer T Shirt available January through December, so why shouldn’t I talk about it all the time.
Read more on Christmas Time It’s the Most Wonderful Time for a Beer T Shirt…
It’s snowing and I think it just dawned on me that it is December, so, of course, I created a Funny Christmas T Shirts page. But, please beware that stuff that is funny to t shirt designers about the holidays may not be, how should I say it, appropriate for mixed company. There are over 25 shirts on this list, and over half of them will not make the carolers at your door happy, unless they’re boozed up with Peppermint Schnapps.
Wow. Are you honored or disgusted when you discover this. It’s so confusing. The first eight years of your life, you believed Santa was real. Then, you catch your Mom wrapping presents and your Dad eating the cookies on the plate left for jolly Saint Nick. And, your whole conception of Christmas, and festivity, and even the trust of your parents is blown apart.
Read more on Santa Rubbed His Balls on Your Toothbrush Tee Shirt…
Can’t be exclude the other celebrations when wishing Happy Holidays, so here’s a token Kwanzaa shout out. What’s cool is that it just takes Santa, makes him black and gives him dialog like he’s the crack dealer’s boss.
Little play on words here. You got the cookies “put out” but you know what’s really going on here. If you want the premium service from jolly Saint Nick you gotta go ahead and give him premium service on his chubby little…di…ning habits.
Hey, this was one of those things where you live and let live. Whatever happens behind closed doors is none of my business. But, then with this everybody’s a star, and “unauthorized” release of star sex videos, and social networking, Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, and Google knowing your every move with maps and Android phone, welp, nothing is secret or sacred any more. All your shit is hanging out for everybody to see, including, incredibly, Santa and his bound babe.
Merry Christmas!
Spend the time with family and friends. Laugh a lot. Eat a lot. Rub your belly a lot. And celebrate the youthful spirit. After you return all those horrid items from your out of touch aunts, uncles, grandparents, coworkers and parents, take that cash and spend it well…meaning buy the Don’t Stop Believin’ tshirt and where it every Holiday season for the rest of your life.
Talk about a naughty Santa Claus tshirt. But I guess if you’re going to develop the type of free labor you need to make the North Pole enterprise feasible, you need to produce a ton o’ elves with Mrs. Claus. See the thing is the result of Mr. And Mrs. Claus’ conjugation was always diminutive people. Just a strange thing that always happened. Anyway, that workforce development has nothing to do with what’s going on here.
