DJ 101 T Shirt

by on January 30, 2013

dj-101-t-shirt

Get this Tee from 6 Dollar Shirts

Before you can rock the house with your turntable, you need to get a handle on the basics of your equipment. You gotta start somewhere, and if you’re an aspiring DJ the best place is with this t-shirt. You can wear it and look in the mirror all the time, until the parts of a turntable are second nature. Then, you can start listening to some music to figure out what’s good.

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Inconceivable T Shirt

by on January 30, 2013

inconceivable-t-shirt

Get this Tee From 6 Dollar Shirts

This might be my favorite of The Princess Bride Vizzizi Inconceivable designs, and, believe me, there are a lot of them. Such an iconic film, and Vizzizi was just a spectacular character. Have you ever been to IMDB and looked at the current pictures of those actors. Pretty amazing. It was released 26 years ago. That’s a long time.

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LTD-spring-break-tie-dye-tee

Get this Shirt from Wild Lemon Clothing

That is one wild skull and cross bones lemon with a tie dye background. Now, let me get this straight because I’m old enough to have seen the 70s first hand. Not the 60s but there were remnants of burnt out tie-dyed hippies still mulling about. What does tie dye signify to the youth of today. I’m guessing Wild Lemon Clothing has a finger on the pulse of the young people, and they’re offering this design up as a special spring break garment, so the tie dye probably represents inebriation and/or getting and wild fucking, because I think that’s probably exactly what it meant in the 60s.

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Moscow 2030 T Shirt

by on January 29, 2013

moscow-2030-t-shirt

Get this Tee from Headline Shirts

At first you think this is one of those misdirection shirts. Oh yeah, Moscow and palm trees and sunsets. Ha ha. But then it hits you like a ton of bricks…this is a WAKE UP CALL. Moscow in 2030 with palm trees. Why, because thanks to carbon emissions we’re changing the weather patterns of the entire globe. The Northern climbs will soon be tropical, while those places down by the Equator are going to be unliveably hot just like Venus and your mom.

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Billy Goat Viking T Shirt

by on January 29, 2013

billy-goat-viking-t-shirt

Get this Tee From Headline Shirts

This is a creepy design. Not creepy as in a 42-year-old pocked-marked drooler hitting on your little sister in the subway, but creepy like that is so absurd that it makes me uncomfortable, and I have a pretty high tolerance for the weird, so think how uneasy the people around me will be when I’m wearing it. Gotta have it…creepy.

Actually, that billy goat likes like he was born to wear the viking helmet. He looks good. Dignified.

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mamas-boy-t-shirt

Get This Shirt From Five Finger Tees

I gotta be honest. Whenever I see the name Jason Voorhees I think it’s some sort of athlete. Then, if the mask is there, I immediately think it’s a goalie in the NHL. Then, I take a step back from my wild mind, and remember that Jason is actually the name of the tormenter in the Friday the 13th movies.

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bruce-campbells-boomstick-soup-t-shirt

Get this Shirt from Five Finger Tees

Bruce Campbell gets some serious play in the t-shirt design world. He’s an iconic figure, playing some of the most memorable horror film roles ever. Plus, his name is Campbell, so there’s that soup thing too. Boomstick, of course, references the movie Army of Darkness where he calls his shotgun a boomstick.

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super-bowl-XLVII-t-shirt

Get this Shirt From Busted Tees

First off…Roman Numerals are kind of weird. You have the X (ten), which is subtracted from the L (fifty), then you have the VII (seven), and you get Super Bowl 47. This is a clever way to portray the two cities represented in the big game: San Francisco 49ers and Baltimore Ravens. The TV show Full House was set in San Francisco while The Wire was shot in the gritty streets of Baltimore.

The Wire:

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dr-johnsons-time-machines-t-shirt

Get This Shirt From Snorg Tees

I don’t know what this is about. Someone help me please. Ooh, just had another idea. Search for 2047. Okay. I’m pretty sure the answer is here. Either that or it’s some reference to Looper that I can’t figure out because I’m weak and haven’t seen the movie. But, I will tell you this. The director is Ryan Johnson, so there you have it.

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Einsteinium T Shirt

by on January 28, 2013

einsteinium-t-shirt

Get this Shirt from Snorg Tees

Is this a real element? Did those crazy scientists discover a new one and decided to name it after Albert? Probably not. Most likely this was a goofy concept in a funny person’s mind, and either they let an artist know about it or they were super special with multiple skills, and were also able to take the idea and make it a reality in Illustrator or Photoshop or whatever.

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what-would-ron-swanson-eat-t-shirt

Get this Shirt From Snorg Tees

Jesus is the one you look to for behavioral direction. And, the visage and wisdom of Ron Swanson is what you should be conjuring when it comes time to decide what to eat. And, I’m guessing the answer that envelopes you like the Holy Spirit is bacon, eggs, and steak. You probably will never eat a vegetable again.

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pierce-and-pierce-murders-and-executions-t-shirt

Get this Shirt From Arcane Projects Movie Tees

American Psycho! What a great little bit of cultural criticism…the 80s were vapid and hedonistic with no soul. The big players in the 80s were beyond morality, so the Bret Easton Ellis, the writer of the novel, the movie was based on, decided to take that bankruptcy of the spirit to its ultimate conclusion. Psychopathic mass murder.

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