I’m bringing up these old school designs, because I’m just now digging through the Deez Teez catalog and they do a good job with some of the classics. Take, for instance, the One Man Wolfpack T Shirt. Obviously, this references the wicked funny scene where Zach Galifianakis, as Alan Garner, gives a little speech on top of a Vegas hotel about being a team and having a night to remember. This is where he spikes the drinks, and cuts his hand in a blood-brother ritual which doesn’t really get any buy in. It’s good stuff.

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Party Crashers T Shirts sits on both sides of the fence and in the middle and off to the side and everywhere in between. I’m going to guess they have a multiple of four employees. And, that there’s a Conservative, a liberal, a Libertarian, and political dropout.They each take turns at the conference table offering up their favorite design concepts that espouse their particular political philosophy. Wait, first, the go to the Census or some polling data and figure how many people are estimated to be in each camp. Then, the do so sophisticated arithmetic that figures out total spending power for each group. Then, they assign a certain amount of shirt designs per X dollars of spending power. This, then, is how the decide what shirts get top billing and how many shirts they do for each affiliation. Obviously, Republicans and Tea Party folks are who they are targeting the most.

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Ouch that’s a rough thing to walk in on, especially when you have actually taken the time out of your busy schedule to buy flowers for your lover. Boom, you walk in on her in bed with a red M&M. Horrible. And, Ms. Pacman’s bra is thrown on the bed and there’s a banana and cherries, which are very suggestive of a cock and balls. And, the whole scene is just awful for Pacman.

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This is a lovely little variation on the I’m on a boat shirt theme. Of course, this was the Saturday Night Live Lonely Island send up about being on a boat and it’s spectacular. More Autotune courtesy of T Pain. And, the quote of the song has to be “I got my swim trunks and my flippie-floppies” which just so happens to be printed on the shirt as well. Basically, you get everything you need to have the best I’m On a Boat T Shirt experience, right here from this offering from Deez Teez. Can you dig?

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It’s a Spoonerism. I don’t have any idea who that is, except that apparently he cataloged comical verbal mix-ups. Read the book Smart Feller Fart Smeller.  Better yet, you’re here for funny t shirts, so how about you pick up the I’m a Smart Feller and You’re a Fart Smeller T Shirt.

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Ed Douchebag T Shirt

by on January 5, 2011

So, this dude graduates from art school in San Francisco then gets interested in tattooing. So, he goes to Japan and learns the craft from some world-renowned tattoo artist. Then he comes back to the U.S. And plys his craft, and he’s popular and it expands into books, and then a clothing line…and that line is the Ed Hardy clothing line. Sounds like pretty real deal credibility, except that I think from the point of tattoo artist to clothier, Ed sold out. His shit just ain’t that interesting. Do you think so?

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Kind of a sneaky thing going on here. From a distance it just looks like you love all of humanity. Anybody that comes into your general vicinity is someone you love because it says so on your shirt. Of course, if they take a closer look they may not feel so great about the direction the population on Earth is taking.

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Teiam Player T Shirt

by on January 5, 2011

This is the one to where to practice if your coach regularly busts out the trite bullshit when trying to motivate your club. The no “I” in team thing is played out. He’ll totally get a kick out of this shirt, especially if, and I’m assuming you’re a basketball player here, you go ahead and pull an Allen Iverson, and never pass the ball. Every time you touch it it’s goin’ up. If the coach looks at you sideways, point at the shirt and keep up the good work. What can he say? Really! You have the Teiam Player T Shirt, where there is an “I” in team and he cannot do anything about it because his motivational skills ain’t even close to “The Gipper” or Lombardi. More like weak sauce if you ask me and Deez Teez.

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Cable has Standards and Practices and there’s a two inch binder of restrictions. Slang terms for the male genitals. Penis, Sir dangles, manaconda, bananamal, the one-legged pigeon, the super soaker. And for breasts: bazangas, habbada habbadas, mahoba hobawitzes, oompa loompas, scoliosis twins. And sexual positions slang: taking grandma to Applebees, decorating the lady cake, Tokyo sandblaster.

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Does anybody have any idea what’s going on here? Conan O’Brien has a new show. Conan has used social media very well to boost the buzz around his new show. Conan has a Twitter account. So, let’s create a shirt that has a Twitter bird with the orangish red hair and a orangish red beak that sort of looks like an orangy red beard in the right light.

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Here’s another one of these Conan O’Brien shirts with the logo to the himself brand that he now promotes with vim and vigor to spite Jay Leno and NBC, and all the blue hairs that sided with Jay. I actually never gave a shit either way about the Tonight Show and what was going on there, but it would do me great honor, if you’re a fan of Conan, to buy this Ginger Hair Conan Logo T Shirt right now. Heck, even if you hate him, you can buy the shirt and burn it, which is like burning him in effigy because his entire essence, which is the swooping red hair, is on the shirt.

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Apparently Busted Tees and Team Coconan have joined forces to deliver you the ultimate Conan Schwag. This shirt is the Team Coco Logo T Shirt, and if you’re such retard fan of Conan O’Brien that you need to have his ginger hair on your chest, then I’ve just done you the biggest favor of the year. Ha Ha. Get it. Of the year…which is only five days old. It’s one of those see you next year jokes. Did you love? Can you feel it? Am I right?

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