Vince Vaughn plays the dude that made with his ownership of a audio components chain called Speaker City in the movie Old School. He wants to help out his bro, Luke Wilson, that’s fallen on hard times by throwing him a big old party. That’s sweet and sweetness and compassion is why Old School, directed by Todd “The Hangover” Phillips, was beloved by all. Oh, and Will Ferrell goes streaking by himself, because no one else will join him. Those two things put this movie in the running for highest grossing film of all time, and you can be certain I am not lying when I say that.

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It’s like the Freemasons except totally funny. I mean, I’m sure if you snuck in on a top secret meeting of a secret society that would be pretty hilarious also with all the cloak and dagger shit, dipshit ritual, and old people smell…acting like they rule the world but they actually only keep the neighborhood polyester cloak fabric shop in business.

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Why are they gone? Keep taking them. I mean there are a lot of very productive, successful adults that took naps. Hell, the Japanese are known to drink black tea right before a nap, sleep for 15-20 minutes and wake up with the refreshment of the sleep, and the buzz of the caffeine kicking in. That’s pretty sweet. But, I guess this Naptime You Don’t Know What You’ve Got ‘Til It’s Gone T Shirt is more of a cute…remember when we were in preschool and had to lie down on those nasty mats, smelling nasty kid farts for 30 minutes every day after lunch. It seemed like it sucked then, but now it seems quaint and like I’d like to lay down every afternoon for a sweet little siesta.

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Sad Cactus Hugz T Shirt

by on January 17, 2011

Hey…I don’t appreciate making light of the unfortunate tragedy that took place in Tucson last month. Yeah, there were no hugz in the desert on January 8. Or I guess there were but they were prickly because of the pain and suffering brought on by the massacre at the hands of the nut job Jared Lee Loughner. Shouldn’t that guy be in the ground already. Anyways…

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I feel like geeks don’t wear the thick framed glasses, unless they’re being ironic, then I don’t think they can be considered geeks, so there’s a fundamental flaw with this shirt. However, I still think thee message is positive, which I’m all for, and I think other than the image, that it is accurate. Geeks are the new sexy. Zuckerberg is getting so much varied tail you can’t even fathom it. Sergey and Larry…forget about it. There’s a reason they were demanding king size beds in there private jets, and it ain’t because they were taking BIG naps. Those are little, geeky dudes.

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Nice bit of wordplay here. You have misery loves company so everybody can feel connected in their lame ass, whoa is me condition. Well, same goes for states of the union. They like to be next to each other and working with each other at the borders. There’s extradition, and, of course, let’s not forget the four corners were Colorado, New Mexico, Utah, and Arizona share a common tourist attraction.

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Cougar Hunter T Shirt

by on January 17, 2011

What’s the age you have to be to qualify as a cougar? I’m pretty sure the targeted boys that they look for are 25 or under. But, I’m not sure on the official cougar. 40+? I like that this shirt flips it around and the young guys are seeking out the horny housewives. I also like that that cute 20-something girl model in the image is wearing the Cougar Hunter T Shirt, like she’s looking for a May-December lesbian fling.

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Reason number 974 that I love the Internet. The amazingly random pop culture personalities that get picked up and turned into cultural icons and Internet memes. Chuck Norris is in the pantheon. The name Chuck Norris conjures an indestructible, undefeatable, super man. But, he’s not a super hero, because that’s cheap. He is a man with incredible will, strength, stamina, intellect, and raw gravitas, rolled up into a hairy red-headed hero package.

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This is cute with a touch of slutty. Actually, that’s too strong, maybe it is just innuendo. Cute with a chance of innuendo. I mean this Take me to Bed or Lose Me Forever T Shirt does has a teddy bear on it, which makes it pretty innocent, because that’s what you do. Take the teddy bear to bed or else the dog “retrieves” it, slobbers all over it, rips it, and buries it behind the oleanders in the back yard at which point you have pretty much lost poor teddy forever.

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Little math wordplay sort of deal going on here. You, being a math wiz, no exactly what a tan line is. I, having dropped out of school in third grade am limited to double digit addition and single digit subtraction as the extent of my math knowledge. Thus, I’m going to do some Google searching to bring you the answer to the question that is on all the minds of the arithmetically challenged: what  the hell is a tan line?

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Busted Tees $10 Clearance

by on January 15, 2011

Hey, get over to Busted Tees and grab a couple, few, dozen of their clearance shirts at the spectacular price of $10 per tee. It’s a great deal and they’re not reprinting any of these, so if you’ve been holding off on a certain design. Now is the time. Do it. Do not delay or you will be left crying in the gutter, homeless, destitute, and doing terrible things for change.

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Velociholmes T Shirt

by on January 15, 2011

Everybody thinks that back in the days of the dinosaurs everything was super primitive. No clothing. No humans (well, the Christians are starting to think dinosaurs and humans walked the Earth together, but I’m talking about thinking individuals). No vehicles. No condos. But, that’s wrong. Just like Atlantis was super advanced, dinosaurs like the one in this Velociholmes T Shirt were so sophisticated they figured out how to put on fashionable tweeds, harvest tobacco and smoke it in pipes, and solve crimes around the raptor community.

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