I’m going to have to call this a misdirection shirt designed by Exploding Dog. You have missiles or bombs coming falling in the blue sky. Yes, the cute little squiggle contrails are kind of cute, and the bombs are tidy packages of red adorableness, and we have the blue sky and fluffy clouds, so there’s a whole lot of wonderful in the scene. But, let’s think ahead 60 seconds. This scene is straight out of Saving Private Ryan or some other horrible war film that I can’t think of right now.

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That robot sort of looks like the dude from Iron Giant, so I’m not sure if that girl is 90 feet tall or this is a miniature version of the Iron Giant. Rather the Iron Average Size. Anyways, I’m not sure what I think about robots getting the girl. Maybe they’re just friends or whatever, but if starts happening that robots keep taking our jobs and then start taking our women, what the hell are we going to do. How are we going to compete. It’s well known that girls prefer “massagers” to most sexual activity with men anyway. Now, you have a skilled robot applying the “massage” and that’s the ballgame. It’s over. Not sure I can agree with this scary Embrace the Future T Shirt, because it looks nice on the surface but has a darkness looming.

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Okay these are not t-shirts but they are incredibly ingenious. The Facebook like thing has infiltrated approximately 76% of every human being’s brain space. As much time as the average person spends on Facebook, their cerebral cortexes are trained to think in this particular binary manner, thus it is very appropriate to offer stamps that simply state what you think. I love this. At work we have accept and decline stamps for print jobs and I like to hold the appropriate one up as I am talking to people and have an opinion on what they’re saying. These are even better. Plus, if I own them, I start stamping all kinds of shit. Asshole manager gets a dislike right on his forehead. Hot ladies like right on the ass. Puppies like. Snakes dislike. Alarm clock dislike. Sleeping in late like – I guess I just stamp the pillow. Any music player playing a song with autotune – dislike. Anything playing a song that is on one of my 92 playlists on Rhapsody. Like. Windows 7. Like. Itunes. Dislike.

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We have a combo shirt so you can get two of the hottest pop culture dealios in one place. With this Harry Potter Twilight T Shirt you get the Harry Potter font and the Twilight name. It’s the best of both worlds and it’s a stunning deal because you only have to pay for one shirt from the very reputable and loveable retailer Busted Tees.

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This shirt is a masterpiece. If you’re into The Simpsons I can’t imagine how you could dissuade yourself from purchasing it from Busted Tees right now. The Springfield 5K T Shirt is a magnificent way of calling out all of the great establishments featured on the iconic animated show. Look at that list of sponsors on the back, and relive all the great entertainment memories:

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Jordan, Jesse Go! T shirt

by on February 22, 2011

Another podcast shout out for Jordan, Jesse Go! from Maximum Fun and sold by Topatoco in the form of a t shirt. These dudes Jordan and Jesse talk about life in your twenties. Boy that will get me all nostalgic for back in the day. Well, I was still living in my mom’s basement back then, but at least I had most of my hair, instead of this male pattern baldness nightmare I have right now. I mean this ‘do sticks out so shiny and unattractive to all the hot chicks I chat with on web cam. How am I supposed to hook up.

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Apparently, there’s a podcast coming out of Canada called Stop Podcasting Yourself and apparently it’s funny shit. It features Graham Clark and Dave Shumka, out of Vancouver. So, this Stop Podcasting Yourself t shirt, complete with our stars and the coat of arms of Vancouver is a reference to this phenomenon, and you know if Topatoco puts out a shirt designed by Maximum Fun, promoting your podcast, then you got something goin’ on. I’m going to have to load it up to the iPod and listen to it as I ride the bus to my evening time janitorial job. Lord knows I need some uplift in those daily dark times.

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Having been in the t shirt for most of my adult life, which has all been spent in my mother’s basement, I have struggled with what to call shirts that combine a little wordplay with graphic shenanigans. If it’s straight up wordplay that’s what I call it. And, if there’s little misdirection like the picture of a cotton square, but the text says cotton round or even cotton ball (ha ha ha ha), then I go ahead and call that misdirection. But, when you have one like this Food For Thought T Shirt where it’s absolutely crucial you read the words and see the image, and it’s not a misdirection, but more of a word image play.

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Wow! This is hardcore wordplay right here. Can you even stand up and read this at the same time or did you have to sit down. Maybe I should have warned you. Something like “hey, this is a powerful bit of wordplay coming here and it includes mention of a mustache, and even shows one.” Then, you could have taken in the rush of adrenaline, composed yourself, then went ahead and opened it up and looked at this I Really Mustache You a Question But I’ll Shave It For Later T Shirt.

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I suppose I should have gone with Pt-shirt just to keep the theme going but I just couldn’t get myself to do it. Perhaps it’s my strict upbringing. The Catholic schooling. The numerous ruler beatings. The dusting of fondling. Whatever. I just couldn’t get myself to put a misspelling of the word t shirt in the title of the post, and now it’s really bugging me. As I work through this issues, I will let you know that this Pterodactyls Are Pterrific T shirt truly is a lovely little bit of word play. I love saying the word Pterodactyl and the thought of them swooping through the air eyeing their next pray is truly wondrous. I totally approve of this shirt from Snorg Tees.

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Meatghost T Shirt

by on February 21, 2011

I like this shirt. It’s gross and random and weird and cute all at the same time. This Meatghost only has one tooth left, a really blank stare, nice floating abilities, and a lot of blood drippings. I guess I’d be scared if I saw this thing hovering over the table or poppin’ out of the fridge. A little amused but ultimately scared, because paranormal meat sightings is out of the ordinary and a bit unknown and can certainly create fear.

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Shitty Mountains T Shirt

by on February 21, 2011

On a touristy looking shirt like this you expect to see Mt. Shasta, or the Ozarks, or Estes Park or something like that. Just a signal that you’ve been to a wonderful mountainous spot. But, here you get the misdirection, and that’s what cool about it. Sometimes you put all your effort into a tough task, you commit to a goal, and you reach the top, you summit the mountain, and you find out that the rewards are not there that the mountain wasn’t you thought it was and you feel dejected. This is the time you need to wear the Shitty Mountains T Shirt.

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