If I watched TV I might know something about 30 Rock and the fake show inside the show called MILF Island. I have a real short clip for you below and it looks pretty funny.

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In case you need to refer to the authoritative source, here’s a website with all the Zombieland rules, including, of course, #32. Now, the beauty of this Rule #32 Enjoy the Little Things T Shirt is that it features a partial twinky, and this isn’t a half-eaten twinky, this is a neatly cut twinky, like a couple of buds, like Jesse “Facebook” Eisenberg and Woody “Cheers” Harrelson decided to split it, got out a ruler and deliberately sliced impossibly even sections.

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Wordplay. Wordplay. And meme. Damn. This thing has everything you need and they do it in three words. Spectacular use of the language. I’m hugely impressed with the Zombie Eat Flesh T Shirt, as it twists the Subway brand and slogan to the deadside. FYI – the real slogan is “Eat Fresh.” Get it?

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Hey now. Sometimes we forget that even the evil empire’s have human stories. Families. Friends. Pets. You know…the whole gamut. So, the next time you’re cheering your ass off for the “hero” to blow up the bad guys and save the day, well just think about this Stormtrooper shedding a tear, and just have a moment in their hard white uniform. Maybe some growth will happen, and that’s a really good and important thing, because when you die the soil the worms turn you into will be more fertile.

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So this Omni Consumer Products T Shirt really speaks to me on a deep level, because the 80s were my glory days. Now, I just live in my mother’s basement. Well, I lived in my mother’s house, but I had an actual room in the house so that was the biggest difference between my life then and my life now. That, and the fact, that there were some classic movies being pumped out of Hollywood, like, for instance, Robocop. Actually, there are classic movies being pumped out now, but they’re not 80s movies if you know what I’m saying.

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This pirate actually has a blouse that is not plastered with Ironic Witticisms, so if we assume he’s talkin’ then this Not All of My Garments Contain Ironic Witticisms T Shirt speaks great truth. What’s all meta about this shirt from Busted Tees is that this shirt happens to feature an ironic witticism, which is what makes it so deep and intriguing and full of life force.

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Isn’t this how it always is? Someone needs service now, because they have a thing…they’re late…they gotta go. But, they cannot be satisfied. Nothing is good enough and it seems like they just make things up not to be happy about. I have been in retail customer service in my life and there are more of these type of people than you want to believe. That’s why this I’m Extremely Picky and Desperate T Shirt is awesome.

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This is sadly what 67% of the United States is saying as they tuck in for the night. But, they’ll soon start to worry when the entire thing goes into the shitter and only the top 1% in accumulated wealth can maintain the lifestyle. It’s going to get ugly, and there’s not a hell of a lot you can do about it at this point, so why not ignore it and get a good night’s sleep. You’ll need the energy for food foraging.

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Dirk Nowitzki got MVP for leading the Dallas Mavericks to a 4-2 series victory over the Miami Heat in the NBA finals. Good for him. He’s been through a lot of crap, including losing the 2006 NBA Finals to the Heat after leading 2-0 and having a 13-point lead in the fourth quarter of game three. Then, the team choked in the playoffs as the number one seed losing to eighth-seeded Golden State. Plus, there was the deal with his stripper girlfriend very publicly trying to game him. But, he’s persevered and he made it through with the team he started with. Great story.

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Hey if you haven’t seen the movie you need to see the movie. The Hangover II does not disappoint as the sequel to one of the biggest comedy hits in history. Instead of Vegas, we’re talking the more exotic Bangkok. Yes! Of course, this Bangkok Smoking Monkeys and Ladyboys T Shirt is in direct reference to some dialogue spoken by one of the characters describing what goes on at the new local. Ha ha. I haven’t seen this damn movie are you kidding me. I’m saving it. I want the desire to build the the pressure in a blister. Yes!

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I feel like the first couple quacks should have question marks after them, the one with no punctuation, then two with the exclamation point, because the first time Emilio gets them to do the chant, they’re not sure what’s going on for a minute. But, then they really get into it. I suppose I can accept this version of the Quack! Quack! Quack! Quack! Quack! T Shirt.

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This feels like it should have been put on sale for Valentine’s Day. It’s such a sweet sentiment and you have the heart. How can this If I Were a Zombie I’d Eat You Most T Shirt not be a special Valentine’s Day Tee? It was specifically designed for lovers. Oh well, I guess Snorg Tees that you have to have the romance more than just one day a year and they’re spreading out the love into the summer months as well.

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