Jawesome Shirt

by on September 15, 2009

jawesome-shirtI’m morally opposed to promoting this travesty of a shirt. Are you kidding me? This cinematic devil fish killed multiple people, put the dark fear in the hearts of an entire township, and portrayed Richard Dreyfuss as an Ahab-like nutter. Plus, this movie adaption of a best selling book,  scared the shit out of a poor five-year-old boy…namely me.

So, if you’re going to get this Jaws celebration, I’m going to have to cut you off in terms of our friendship. I just can’t approach it the same. That doesn’t matter to you?! Then go ahead, put your hard-earned money down for the Jawesome Shirt, but realize your guardian angels are weeping profusely.

And don’t even get me started on selling this, this travesty with scantily clad, nubile red headed, luscious, girl flesh.

Go ahead, watch the trailer if you dare:

There is a creature alive today…
…that has survived millions of years of evolution…
…without change, without passion, and without logic…

It lives to kill, a mindless eating machine…
It will attack, and devour, anything.

It is as if God had created the devil, and gave him…JAWS!

Get the inside scoop with the Snorg Tees Review.

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