Funny Christmas T Shirts for Extra Happy Holidays

by on December 4, 2010

Here’s how it works for the holidays. Sometimes you want to wear nice cool clothing that you purchased or were  gifted. That’s cool. But, there’s also that impulse that compels you to turn on Xmas music during this season.  It just feels right for some reason. It’s a connection to the rest of the world and to the time of year, and it gives you a warm feeling inside.

That’s where I think these funny Christmas T Shirts come in. The following shirts are all related to Xmas in some way, and I take that back about the warm fuzzies on some (or most) of these, because a few are just pure offensive, but in the funny t shirt business I deal with the entire spectrum and I try not to shy away from much.

Without further ado, the shirts Santa would have you wear starting at least two weeks out from Christmas. Oh, and I have some Hannukah and Kwaanza in there to round it out and be a little more inclusive because I’m sensitive like that.

Muri Christmas Merica T Shirt

muri-christmas-merica-t-shirt

Santa Rubbed His Balls On Your Toothbrush T Shirt

santa-rubbed-your-toothbrush-on-his-balls-t-shirt

No Christmas T Shirt

no-christmas-t-shirt

Happy Festivus T Shirt

bt-happy-festivus

This Girl Loves Christmas T Shirt

this-girl-loves-christmas-t-shirt

Griswold Family Christmas Hat

griswold-family-christmas-hat

Transformers Christmas Sweater

transformers-christmas-sweater

You Don’t Smell Like Santa T Shirt

you-dont-smell-like-santa-t-shirt

A Charlie Brown Christmas T Shirt

a-charlie-brown-christmas-t-shirt

Charlie Brown Pathetic Christmas Tree T Shirt

a-charlie-brown-christmas-tree-t-shirt

A Christmas Story Leg Lamp Dress

a-christmas-story-leg-lamp-dress

A Christmas Story Bunny Suit

 

bunny-suit

If It’s and But’s Were Candy and Nuts We’d All Have a Merry Christmas T Shirt

if-ifs-and-buts-were-candy-and-nuts-wed-all-have-a-merry-christmas-t-shirt

I’m So Good Santa Came Twice T Shirt

im-so-good-santa-came-twice-t-shirt

Santa Hates Jewish Kids T Shirt

santa-hates-jewish-kids-t-shirt

Keep The Chan in Chanakuh T Shirt

keep-the-chan-in-chanukah

Happy Fonza T Shirt

happy-fonza-t-shirt

Santa Has Diabetes T Shirt

santa-has-diabetes-t-shirt

I Put the Christ Ma in Christmas T Shirt

i-put-the-christ-ma-in-christmas-t-shirt

Taking Back Christmas T Shirt

take-back-christmas-t-shirt

Merry Krampus T Shirt

merry-krampus-t-shirt

I Want To Believe T Shirt

i-want-to-believe-t-shirt

Ugly Darth Vader Christmas Sweater

darth-vader-christmas-sweater

He-Man She-Ra Christmas Sweater

he-man-she-ra-christmas-sweater

Game of Thrones Winter is Coming

winter-is-coming-t-shirt

What’s better than a Game of Thrones and Santa’s sleigh mashup? Nothing. That’s why it is your duty to pick this one up before you head over to Granny’s house for Christmas goose.

Festival of Lightsabers T shirt

festival-of-lightsabers-t-shirt

I know this is a Christmas page and it probably isn’t right to feature a Jewish Manora here, but it’s the holiday season and it has to be done. Shalom.

Don’t Stop Believin’ T Shirt

dont-stop-believin-t-shirt

Gotta stay young in the mind if you want to make it through with a good attitude.

Santa Claus is Coming T Shirt

santa-claus-is-coming-t-shirt

Oh. Oh my. What does that say. He must be tired from all his travel. Wait…is this naughty?

Home Alone Buzz Your Girlfriend Woof T shirt

buzz-your-girlfriend-t-shirt

Classic Christmas movie and one of the better lines. Many people don’t know that Buzz’s girlfriend was Megan Fox. She shed that baby fat and looks pretty good.

Home Alone Wet Bandits T Shirt

home-alone-wet-bandits-t-shirt

There’s nothing Christmasy about this shirt itself, but everybody thinks Xmas when this movie comes up, so it definitely belongs on this list.

Christmas Story Leg Lamp T Shirt

a-christmas-story-leg-lamp-t-shirt

Another classic moment in Christmas cinema. It’s a major award.

I Don’t Exist Santa T Shirt

santa-i-dont-exist-t-shirt

Break it to those that still believe quick like ripping off a Band-Aid. Don’t prolong the lie, which ultimately turns into pain.

Griswold Family Christmas T Shirt

 

griswold-family-christmas-t-shirt

Ah, the family station wagon with the Christmas tree on top. Classic!

Christmas Vacation Jelly of the Month T Shirt

 

jelly-of-the-month-t-shirt

The next best thing to being a member of the jelly of the month club is to wear this shirt.

Christmas Vacation Merry Christmas Shitter Was Full T Shirt

 

merry-christmas-shitter-was-full-t-shirt

Nothing like getting up Xmas morning and seeing your neighbors relative emptying his RV septic into the street sewer. Merry Christmas!

I Dedicate This House to the Griswold Family Christmas T Shirt

 

i-dedicate-this-house-to-the-griswold-family-christmas-t-shirt

Nothing like a warm house and close relationships for the holidays.

A Christmas Story Ralphie Ohhhhh Fuuudge T Shirt

 

a-christmas-story-oh-fudge-t-shirt

But that’s not what Ralphie really said, and he got in big trouble for saying it. Soap in the mouth.

I Triple Dog Dare You T Shirt

 

a-christmas-story-i-triple-dog-dare-you-t-shirt

Man that hurts when you have your tongue stuck to a lamp post. But, hey, you took the dare head on.  That counts for something.

It’s a Major Award Leg Lamp T Shirt

 

a-christmas-story-leg-lamp-its-a-major-aware-t-shirt

Best lamp in movie history. Cool design style too.

A Christmas Story I Triple Dog Dare You T Shirt

a-christmas-story-i-triple-dog-dare-you-t-shirt-2

This is the close up version of this classic scene from the best Xmas movie ever.

A Christmas Story Leg Lamp T Shirt

fragile-leg-lamp-t-shirt

That’s a sexy and beautiful lamp. No?

Elf Raised by Elves T Shirt

 

raised-by-elves-t-shirt

Love the outline of the Ferrell fro and elf hat. Nice.

Santa Oh My God Santa’s Coming I Know Him I Know Him T Shirt

 

santas-coming-i-know-him-t-shirt

I’m a sucker for cute Christmas movies and this scene was wonderful. Buddy is such a goob.

Elf Smiling’s My Favorite T Shirt

 

elf-smilings-my-favorite-t-shirt

Smiling is good for your health and your soul. Do it. Buddy does.

Seinfeld A Festivus For the Rest of Us T Shirt

 

a-festivus-for-the-rest-of-us-t-shirt

Hey, what happens when you’re not religious and don’t celebrate in the traditional ways. Festivus!

Happy Festivus T Shirt

 

happy-festivus-t-shirt

Come on now. Tell me. Does anyone really through Festivus parties? ‘Cuz if you and your friends are awesome.

Christmas Vacation Christmas Moose Mug T Shirt

christmas-vaction-moose-mug-t-shirt

Merry Christmas The Shitter’s Full T Shirt

green-merry-christmas-shitters-full

From National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation: cousin Eddie just emptying out the RV toilet into the storm sewer.

You’ll Shoot Yer Eye Out Kid T Shirt

 

youll-shoot-your-eye-out-kid-t-shirt

A Christmas Story: “I want an official Red Ryder, carbine action, 200-shot range model air rifle!”

Deez Nuts Roasting on an Open Fire T Shirt

deez-nuts-roasting-on-an-open-fire-t-shirt

Nuthin’ like combining hip hop classics with standard Christmas tunes. If you mix Dr. Dre with Bing Crosby this is what you get.

Talledega Nights: 8 Pound Six Ounce Newborn Infant Jesus Don’t Even Know a Word Yet T Shirt

8-pound-6-ounce-infant-jesus-t-shirt

Ricky Bobby prefers to say grace to the Christmas baby Jesus. I say it’s his perogative.

Don’t Stop Believin’ T Shirt

dont-stop-believin

Straight up keep Santa in your heart shirt, as in stay young at heart.

Sleigher T Shirt

sleigher-t-shirt

Nice little wordplay. Suppose you can say Santa rides a sleigh, so he’s a sleigher.

Santa’s Lil Stinker T Shirt


If you have a piece of work in your life you can tell them you love ’em and still get in a little dig about how naughty they are with this one.

Hey Santa I Need a Job T Shirt


Very appropriate as they recession continues. I heard unemployment is up to 9.8 percent, so there’s a lot of people out there on whom this shirt fits a little too well.

Guide My Sleigh I’m Drunk T Shirt


One Christmas he needed Rudolph’s red nose because the weather was so bad, but it turned into a habit and year-after-year Santa got worse, putting more and more of the gift delivery responsibility on the reindeer.

Santa I Don’t Exist T Shirt

santa-i-dont-exist-merry-christmas-t-shirt

Gotta discover the truth sooner or later. Add the middle finger for emphasis.

I Put Out for Santa T Shirt

i-put-out-for-santa-t-shirt

Cookies. I put out cookies. There are cookies on the shirt. What did you think it meant?

Your Mom is a Whore Merry Christmas T Shirt

your-mom-is-a-whore-merry-christmas-t-shirt

This was totally uncalled for. And, plus, I really don’t think she is, but I guess you never know. Thanks for the holiday wishes though.

Merry Kwanzaa Bitches T Shirt

merry-kwanzaa-bitches-t-shirt

This is the holiday where they took their favorite bits from each of the major religion’s holidays. Right? Like Santa and the menorah. What am I saying. This is a total pimp daddy black stereotype and it’s terrible.

Xmasochist T shirt


There’s Mrs. Claus and Santa having a little kinky fun. It’s a nice wordplay, but I’m starting to think I should have added a warning about eight shirts ago.

Dear Santa Fuck You You Judgmental Prick T Shirt

dear-santa-fuck-you-you-judgmental-prick-t-shirt

If the holidays put your in a sour mood, well then this one may lift your Christmas spirits.

I Saw Mommy Kissing Mrs. Claus T Shirt

i-saw-mommy-kissing-mrs-claus-t-shirt

And, to wrap it up, just in case you didn’t have enough a troublesome enough time processing that last Mrs. Claus image, here’s another. I’m really sorry this went off the rails like this.

Christmas T Shirts Gallery

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