Best Funny Jesus Tshirts

by on August 6, 2010

Well, what’s more appropriate than featuring the funniest Jesus T-shirts on the day Christians throughout the world celebrate his resurrection. Not much. Maybe, coloring eggs with toxic dyes, or eating chocolate bunnies, or wearing ugly pastels, but other than that an in depth look at the funny Jesus T Shirts is best way to celebrate Easter.

Without further ado, here’s the best of the best shirts that depict Jesus Christ, the Lord and Savior and son of God:

Jesus Loves You Tshirt

Jesus Loves You

The Son of God loves you and he’ll prove it by making a mix tape and playing it on a boom box above his head. That’s dedication to go all retro like that. And you thought I was going to talk about John Cusack and dying for your sins.

Last Supper Sausage Fest tshirt–Jesus Pulls Together a Last Minute Meal With Friends

Last Supper Sausage Fest

Nobody knew this boys night out was gonna get so heavy. Plus, what a pain calling for the gravy from the other side of the table. Gotta walk that shit all the way to the other end.

Abstinence: 99% Effective Tee

Abstinence 99.99% Effective

This is going back to the beginning with little baby Jesus and Mary birthing the savior without doing the carnal deed. Ah, the miracles of ancient mysticism.

Jesus BRB Baby

Buddy Jesus BRB

This one greatly resembles the Buddy Christ in the movie Dogma. Just kind of used car salesman or MLM guru slick. Of course, the robe, beard and long hair temper that effect, making me want to drop everything and follow him.

BRB Jesus ‘a Comin’ Back T Shirt

Jesus BRB

Another take on the brilliant BRB angle. Dude looks like Spicoli with an edge in this one. You kind of believe that he will certainly Be Right Back (BRB), after he takes on the sins of the world, does some kung fu on the devil, and metamorphs into a dove.

Jesus Saves Piggy Bank T shirt

The Savior of the World is very fiscally responsible, which is a very poignant message in these economically troubled times, where bankers buy jets, islands, and the super expensive hookers, while everybody else eats Taco Bell and drives a Datsun.

Jesus Saves Hockey Goalie

Jesus Saves Hockey Goalie

Jesus Saves Soccer Goalie

Good with the money and a two-sport athlete. Actually, he also plays hurling, but his favorite sports are hockey and soccer, and, of course, he’s the last line of defense. Like when evil people breathe sin, disregard the faith until their dying day, then get all contrite and ask for the ultimate save.

Ante Christ Tshirt

Ante Christ

What you have here is a play on words. Instead of the scary end of times Anti Christ, we’re talking about Jesus being a little slow to put skin in the game.

Jesus In a Tuxedo Tee Shirt

Tuxedo Shirt Jesus

Even Jesus experienced the eternal conundrum. I want to be formal, but I’m here to party. And the ultimate answer. The tuxedo tshirt. Sometimes the best answers are the most obvious.

Jesus Is My Homeboy T Shirt

I like how ethnic this Jesus looks. It’s one of those dudes in an 80s rhythm and blues band, or maybe he’s the bass in a singing quartet. But, whatever the case, this shirt lets people know you’re down with the Christ.


Jesus Is a Shitty Scientist T-shirt

Jesus Shitty Scientist

Hey, in the 21st Century we understand that science and magic are two different things. Yes, Sarah Silverman says Jesus is Magic and he was. Walking on water. Water to wine. Multiplying the fishes and loaves. And, rising from the dead. All of that shit is way better than David Blaine and Criss Angel combined. But, he wasn’t so good with the science.

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