Human = faster than a piglet and just shy of a young polar bear. You adjust that carrot top’s form and you might see him jump a spot or two on the creature speedometer. I mean Ron Howard there, ain’t lookin’ like Usain Bolt if you know what I mean. Anyways, this shirt is more cute than funny, though thinking about the orange guy with a ton of freckless, lining up on his mark versus a turkey to see gets placed where is a pretty humorous mind brain visual.
Get the shirt: As Fast as I Can, which is a nose faster than a turkey tom.
You might want to check up on mammal speeds, just to make sure your attire is accurate. You’ll have to trust the artist on tree, snail, turtle, turkey, and ostrich because they are not mammals and there is no record of their speed anywhere on the Internet or anywhere else.
‘cuz your mama loves Threadless Tshirts.