January 2012

Love the toast with the French facial hair. Oui Oui. Not much more to say about it. It’s cute and clever and it’s making me hungry except I don’t eat French toast. I only eat eggy bread. That’s what French toast was called in my house growing up. No, no it was none of that anti-France stuff. It was just what we called it up there in the thin air in the Mile High City.

Read more on Bonjour French Toast Lover T Shirt from Red Bubble…


Ah the ubiquitous blue and red professional logo with the white figure. I did some research on this logo before. I think it started with the MLB, but I’m too lazy to even go back into my archives to check it out. Suffice to say it has some legs like 44 years later. Okay, wait. The dude’s name was Jerry Dior. Then the NBA did the same thing and now every video game, iconic movie, and soon everybody on earth will have their own Dior logo.

Read more on National Skyrim Association T Shirt from Red Bubble…


24 Tee is another one of these shirt a day t-shirt shops, but they differentiate themselves with really clean, really cool designs.

Basically, they post a shirt at midnight and you have 24 hours to purchase. Otherwise, it’s gone and you live with bitter regret for the rest of your miserable days. What I’m saying is…unless you have cash in hand and are ready to make a purchase right when you hit the site, you better not even go. The disappointment of seeing a shirt you like — they pump out a lot of great ones — and forgetting to get it within the allotted time is a terrible, terrible feeling.

Read more on Hurry Or You’ll Be Hurt from 24 Tee…


I’m going to tell you something right now that may come as a bit of a shock: war’s a bitch! Even the bad guys, like this Storm Trooper, have feelings. They bond with their co-evil killers. There’s love in the midst of the darkness, which is why war is never the answer. Well that’s not true, but it’s not a very good answer. Diplomacy, money laundering, and secret rebel killing is a much cleaner way to go, and the public relations is a breeze, because nobody has any idea that it’s going on.

Read more on Star Wars Storm Trooper I Had Friends on the Death Star T Shirt from Five Finger Tees…


The question is who’s hatin’ on who? Yeah, Oscar is grouchy and unpleasant, but is that really hate or just general dislike for everything and everybody. Maybe it’s y’all given Oscar hell for being the Grouch. In other words….hating on him. Nah, you’re right this Haters Gonna Hate T Shirt is all about Oscar being a Hater and doing what he does best, which is hate.

Read more on Sesame Street Oscar the Grouch Haters Gonna Hate T Shirt from Five Finger Tees…


This here is a very fine t-shirt from Uncle Cletus. I have been on my high, political horse lately, trying to make points about things I don’t really understand. Sounding indignant. Warning of impending doom. And encouraging people to fight back against the Oligarchy and growing fascist state. Of course, I’m just sitting here wondering how many of the Commodores were gay, and eating Fritos, which is pretty much my nightly ritual.

Read more on Occupy My Pants T Shirt from Uncle Cletus…


Types of Sharks T Shirt

by on January 11, 2012

Let me go down the list of sharks on this Types of Sharks T Shirt in case you can’t read the image.

Bull Shark
Blue Shark
Great White Shark
Nurse Shark
Shortfin Mako Shark
Hammerhead Shark
Loan Shark
Pool Shark

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What’s Headline Shirts trying to get at with this one. I’m not sure. You have the Statue of Liberty holding a beer in place of the torch and on the book it says “I’m just saying.” Is the shirt a commentary about how low brow American culture has become, and the concepts of liberty and freedom don’t really mean anything to anyone because they just want to booze it up and watch the latest installment of the most reality tv show programming you can think of.

Read more on Could Be Worse Statue of Liberty T Shirt…


Not sure what Busted Tees is trying to get at here. You have the misspelling of the name of the greatest band in music history, which is weird because whenever I want to hear The Beatles, I type their name into Rhapsody, hoping beyond hope that they worked with Paul and got the right to stream the music. But, alas, bitter disappointment. Been then I think maybe I spelled it wrong, because I do that with The Beetles. But, alas, more disappointment because Rhapsody hasn’t landed the Fab Four. Yeah, iTunes has the whole catalog, but not Rhapsody. Anyways, there’s always Youtube. I suppose I could also get a job and then just pay for some Beatles downloads or even a CD, but I spend 16 hours a day on this blog out of the goodness of my heart, so that, you, my precious reader, will have some inspiring prose to consume on a daily basis.

Read more on Number 1 Beetles Fan T Shirt from Busted Tees…

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Goddamn this is a funny one right here. Made me laugh like a fool. Game of Thrones is such heavy programming. Lots of honor, swords, beards, and long stares.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m a sucker for that kind of gritty, drama business. The beauty of this Summer is Coming T Shirt is multi-faceted.

Read more on Game of Thrones Summer is Coming T Shirt from Busted Tees…


Um, if I think this band sux, does that mean I should like this shirt, because it sort of makes fun of their creative band naming process, and perhaps hints that a band that goes for Eve 6 as their name probably lacks that certain something in other bandly ways as well? That’s the way I’m going to take this Possible Band Names Eve 6 T Shirt.

Read more on Possible Band Names Eve 6 T Shirt from Busted Tees…

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Available in Men's and Women's sizes.

Editor’s note: Thanks to our dear readership, we have discovered that is not an Angry Bird at all, rather a Goomba from Super Mario. Please accept my sincerest apology if you have been in any way hurt or misled by the incorrect analysis of this t-shirt.

Read more on Super Mario Goomba Don’t Tread On Me T Shirt from Busted Tees…