May 2011

I have no idea what this is from. I searched for like 13 hours on the Internet and can’t figure it out. Some game or cartoon or some shit. They get bags of money if they defuse the bombs. The bombs have extraordinarily long fuses. When I first saw this Cartoon Bomb Squad T Shirt I thought it was an old school scuba diver that found out that his life line of oxygen was actually connected to a bomb. I thought it was funny until it stopped making much sense. How would the diver get to the sea bottom without realizing he wasn’t hooked up to the oxygen.

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My excellent investigation skills have uncovered the origin of this Flanders’ Hot Dogs No Foot Longs T Shirt. Here’s what went down in an episode from 2000: “The Simpsons: Alone Again, Natura-Diddly (#11.14)”.

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That’s one of those reel-to-reel tape recorders. Old School for sure, but you definitely get a richer, more gritty sound, which may be what you’re after if you’re a musician that sweats and bleeds music, rather than molding plastic for demographic studying record execs.

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Hey, when you know you’re ready to get the thing underway, there’s no harm in letting everybody know about it. You know that feeling when you really have your shit together, like nothing can  stop you from your goals and that the journey will be fulfilling? Me neither, but rumor has it that if you where the All Systems Are Go T Shirt, you actually start to feel like that.

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This Michael Scott Goodbyes Stink Shirt, of course, references Michael Scott’s last episode on The Office and his little voice recorder message to himself for a t shirt idea “goodbyes stink.” Time for actor Steve Carell to move on.

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Wordplay. Right here. I’m tellin’ ya. It’s wordplay all up in here. Too Err is Human To Moo is Bovine T Shirt totally twists around the original Too Err is Human To Forgive is Divine. Or is it Too Err is Human to Err again shame on me. I forget, but this tee inserts a cow, and references cow language “moo” and uses the Latin name for the cow “bovine” so you know it’s pretty powerfully absurd and awesome.

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Another little switcherooni on standard gags. Free Hugs is a good shirt. Free Hugs on the front and slut hugger on the back is a good shirt. But, Standard Hugs Free Deluxe Hugs $1.00 T Shirt is quite spectacular. And, really, the purpose of all these shirts is to start a conversation, and what better way to start chatting up a chick than talking about paying for physical favors. It’s classy and there’s an 87% chance you wind up in the sack, and that’s if you have nothing else going that night. This shirt from Snorg Tees picks up the slack even when your quick wit, dance moves, and fine threads are just not there.

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This here is a different take on the hole talk to the hand phenomenon. Normally, you have some nerd that’s watched too much TV tell you to talk to the palm of their hand, because they disagree with your not so rosy assessment of Coldplay. The hand in question is basically like a “stop” sign, and it’s pretty clear you’re words are not welcome here.

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Birds T Shirt

by on May 16, 2011

I don’t think this Birds T Shirt is referencing the horror film directed by Alfred Hitchcock, but I guess you can’t be sure. It doesn’t feel as creepy and scary as that movie. Those birds don’t seem to be after anybody, but maybe that’s the kind of thinking that got the people in the movie in trouble. At first it was like oh look at that cute bird to oh my that’s quite an impressive flock of birds to oh my god that gaggle of birds is attacking me and I’m missing an eye. So, be careful with this tee. It might be the beginning of something dastardly. You never can tell.

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MechaHeart T Shirt

by on May 16, 2011

This is a cool, cool shirt. You have a mechanical heart with plastic valves and rivets and a ton of little gears making it pump. I’m not sure, but I think this was the original Jarvik 7 design. The other really sweet thing about this Mechaheart T Shirt is that the image is on the top left of the shirt (i.e. where your heart is). Unfortunately, it looks like 604 Republic only has this design available on the baby doll style tee, which is mostly for women and boys with a certain flare, shall we say.

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PalmerCash is calling to you and they are saying we have t shirts and other good things that you need. Come visit and be impressed with our selection and our eclectic mix of random and licensed shirts. You’ll regret it. Actually, before you go, make sure to read the review I just posted of PalmerCash. Okey dokey. Have a good one.

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PalmerCash is a fairly well known retailer comparable to an Urban Outfitters…a hip, young shop with interesting apparel and knick knacks. Of course, as a reviewer of funny t shirts I’m concerned with the Palmer Cash catalog of tees, which is rich with weirdness and interesting concept and design.

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