May 2011

There are two distinct areas in the Adventureland amusement park in 1987. Games and rides. We covered the Games tee a while ago. Now, we got the rides goin’ on right here. Did you like the movie? Did it remind you of when you were a zygote in your mother’s womb and she smoked and drank and worked at a minimum job to pay for the expenses that a 17-year-old high school drop out incurs. It sure did for me, except I was 17 years old and living in the upstairs of my mom’s house, instead of the basement where I reside now.

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Of course, Smart Tech was the electronics store that Steve Carell’s character, Andy Stitzer, worked in the movie 40 Year Old Virgin, directed by obscure autuer Judd Apatow.

Good movie. Carell, Catherine Keener, Paul Rudd, Seth Rogen, Jane Lynch, Jonah Hill…these are funny people. But, you know that…you’ve seen it five times. It’s one of your favorite. And, you probably already hit the buy button to get the Smart Tech T Shirt because you love the fact that you get the opportunity to own it.

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I totally know some stuff about bowling and I have to say this Spare T Shirt doesn’t make a lick of sense, and in some ways that appeals to me.

I love the way the bowling bowl is walking off with two fluttery-eyed pins and leaving one (the spare) behind. It has to be extra tough on the one that got left behind because she knows she looks exactly the same as the others and it must have been the personality that turned Mr. Bowling Ball off. Or maybe it was just the luck of the draw, and she pulled the short straw. Anyways, if that was only the first roll, she may still get picked up and that’s where the spare comes in.

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What a pretentious bird we have on our hands here. Thinks he’s so smart. Knows obscure bands from the 60s…oh wait they played the Super Bowl just a while ago for God knows what reason, but he doesn’t watch sports so he doesn’t know that. He has a Magic Bus 45 and he thinks he’s discovered The Shit. Wait, ’til I blow all my other hipster friends’ minds. Oh wait…they’ll show no emotion through their just for looks horn-rimmed glasses. They’ll just say that’s nice and rifle through their satchel for nothing.

Read more on Hipster Owl Who? You’ve Probably Never Heard of Them T Shirt…

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Massive wordplay going on here. Basically, it’s a double wordplay. And it’s cute. What’s not to like about cute wordplay. And what could be better. Maybe ugly foreplay, but that’s about it. Anyways…you know Beatrix Potter was a huge boozer. Yeah, she always talked about drinking tea, but that was for the kids. She probably had a stack of manuscripts for adults with Peter the Rabbit in far different scenarios, including starting his own brew pub and serving frogs and hedgehogs, and serving out of the most precious little mugs, and smoking hashish…but, unfortunately Ms. Potter passed away before she could consent to having those works printed. Masterful I’m sure…just like her work for the youth.

Read more on Peter Cotton Ale Now With More Hops T Shirt…

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You see a lot of these evolution tshirts with different themes. This one happens to be regarding Wolverine from X-Men. Start out with the totally bent over monkey, knuckles dragging, straighten up a bit, build a spear as a weapon, and then all of a sudden you have a species that can insert metal blades into the hands to create a very vicious claw action. The hair on top of the head the face stayed about the same as that original monkey though, so, perhaps a well-shaven dude with claws in his hands and bending backwards at the waist is the next stage in the evolution.

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This is the shirt the employees at Adventureland wear in the movie Adventureland. You know Jesse Eisenberg, from Social Network fame, is in there doing his deadpan sort of thing. Director Greg Mottola, also did that awesome film Superbad, so you probably want to get this Games Games Games Games Games T shirt simply because it’s funny, it’s got good pedigree, and you like games.

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This is a nice one. I like wearing a shirt that tells people that you are special. It may not even be true. You may be wearing this Honor Student t shirt and have a 1.9 grade point average. Doesn’t matter in t shirt land, because you can wear whatever you want as long as it’s not offensive. Well, you can wear offensive tees to but you have to be in the appropriate setting.

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The spread shot was the ultimate weapon in the NES version of Contra. Do you remember all you older gamer geeks? Am I right? I know I am because there’s a Contra Spread T Shirt and if there’s a shirt that means it was awesome.

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