April 2011

Hidee ho! Just wanted to let you know that I just posted a review of Tshirt Bordello, and it’s quite positive. As I explain in the review, I had taken a good look at the T Shirt Bordello before, and they just didn’t excite me that much, but they have certainly ramped their shit up a notch or two, and I just have to give them two thumbs and one toe up.

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I’ve seen this one before, but it’s still a good offering. Very clever way to portray the title of a very popular TV show. You have the typical weather forecast 7-day forecast with icons, and, of course, for Philadelphia it’s bright sun across the board because It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Get it. Do you get how this It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia Weather Forecast T Shirt is using the humor. Clever, eh?

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Sometimes you have to blow out the cobwebs with absurd randomness and this Monkey Chandelier T Shirt fits the bill. First, that has to be one of those massive chandeliers in a huge hall with about 6000 little sparklie prisms casting that champagne colored light onto the hardwood floor and the fancy, well-coiffed people mingling below. I say it has to be massive because it dwarfs the monkey. Now, I suppose the monkey could be any number of sizes. I don’t know my monkeys that well, but I know that some are tiny and some are pretty large.

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Everybody likes the Einstein. He had style, a sense of humor, great hair, a conscience, and I hear he was also kind of smart and figured out some cool stuff that continues to help move science and technology forward. Mashup this larger than life figure with the underground graffiti stencil art movement and you have a dynamic shirt that makes you look super cool and smart and interesting and basically irresistibly desirable. Sound like something you might want? Then go ahead and plunk down your money for the Einstein Graffiti Stencil T Shirt because it’s the right thing to do for your image.

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Poor George Lucas. Everybody thought that Chewbacca Wookie character was straight from the fertile imagination of George, but in reality it was a way he could express his true self through cinema. You see, he grows that much hair every night, and has to get up two hours early every morning just to look presentable. He keeps a thick due on top and a beard on the face to cover the fact that he’s chinless. This George’s Secret T Shirt finally brings the truth to light.

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If you play the game that is referenced in this shirt with the little baby dragon and the big egg, then you will love that there’s a little dream here with all the horrible creatures and pitfalls that get in the way of being successful at the game. Obviously, I have no idea what this game is. Looks sort of like Super Mario Galaxy Dino Piranha, but I really don’t have the extra eight minutes it’s going to take me to randomly happen upon a good description of this game with pics, so I can match them up to what’s going on with this Bad Dreams T Shirt.

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Start from the monkey. Become more upright. Pick up the first weapon (a jagged stone). Grow a mullet and make a spear. Cut your hair stand up straighter and develop gun technology. Finally, burn yourself to shit, have your arm hacked off, created an artificial respirator mask and a develop a leather (or is that vinyl) uniform, and, of course, master the greatest weapon ever invented, the light saber. Of course you have the Evolution of Evil T Shirt here and it is magnificent.

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I do not know who this dude is but he’s ’bout ready to chomp on an apple, and in my book that’s not evil at all. But, I guess if you think pieces of fruit are sentient beings or that apples have feelings or at least apple trees, then maybe the sentiment on this Not Evil Just Hungry T Shirt clashes with your eating ideology. Of course, you’re killing 100,000s of micro-organisms as you sit there mouth breathing and reading this with your lips moving.

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This is funny. Someone got all done up for Easter Sunday, and the puritanical stick in the mud with no flava tells her she looks like a hussy. That’s a life defining moment. Either she stands up and tells the white egg off and walks out never to be seen again. Or she wilts, crys, smears the coloring, and becomes a beaten person with barely registering life force. I’m anxious to see what happens, except that this You Look Like a Hussy T Shirt is a snap shot in time, and doesn’t tell the entire narrative.

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I think this wordplay humor may be a little too sophisticated even for my super sophisticated sense of the comedic. Do writers do it literally, because they type the word on the page? Or is it supposed to be literarily. Or hell I don’t even know, but that’s why I like Writers Do It Literally T Shirt. It may very well make no sense, or it may make all the sense in the world after six years of wash and wear, like one sunny Saturday afternoon you’re just sitting there in the middle of the yard with a dandelion stuck in your nose, and boom, the brilliance of Snorg Tees hits you in that moment.

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This poor little piggy has been so traumatized on the farm by this chicken hawk, bird of prey, evil cardinal, I don’t even know what…but the family is shelling out like $95 a session to get that pigs head back on straight. And, he’s having a tough time laying on the couch, recounting his fears and experiences, cry like a baby, all the while this Freud dude is cooly taking notes and asking probing questions.

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This polar bear is enjoying a cheese burger if I’m not mistaken and that makes him an omnivore, because that’s both meat and vegetable going on right there. Of course, this I’m An Om Nom Nom Ivore T Shirt has a second layer and that’s the whole nom nom nom phenomenon that is supposed to represent eating vigorously with much gusto. It certainly fits in this instance, because that burger is damn tasty even if his mom made it.

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