January 2011

Nice little play on words here. Let’s not forget big roasted chicken and big grilled bratwurst. Oh wait, they doesn’t quite have the wordplay angle we’re looking for. Still, I’m super happy there are vegetarians in the world because that lessens the demand for meat, which reduces methane gas, and cow pie runoff, and chicken shit piles, and leaves more meat for me. Of course, I’m a snob and only eat hormone free, free range, grass-fed, clean meat, which is much more humane (as much as treating a creature nice prior to killing them and eating them can be), and more healthy.

Read more on Becoming a Vegetarian is a Big Missed Steak T Shirt…

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Let’s see what we have here. Sombrero on a tequila bottle. One of those furry winter hats from Russia with a star on the front on a bottle of vodka. A beat up old cowboy hat on some whiskey. Pirate hat on the rum. And a sophisticated top hat on the gin, because top hatters drink G&T’s. This is a lovely shirt. What would happen if you got all the drinkers represented on this Celebrate Diversity T Shirt in the same room, imbibing the alcohol of their choice.

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Can’t get enough of Zach Galifianakis or The Hangover. This was a spectacular film and this scene was miraculous. Perfect ZG…he interrupts somebody else’s speech, pulls out a paper to read from, talks about a one man wolfpack, then proceeds to be mean, corny, sweet, and scary in about the space of 2 minutes. Awesome! Can someone tell me why embedding is disabled on all of the One Man Wolfpack clips on Youtube. What the hell? Am I right?a

Read more on The Hangover One-Man Wolfpack T Shirt…

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Pick up on this…Salt-N-Pepper nailed it with that Push It song.

This dance for everybody. Only the sexy people. So, if you’re not sexy, the next best thing to do is to get the lawn mower out and push it. Make sure you have the black mid-calf black socks and a real chunky boot or an off-brand white sneaker. Not sure if you have enough balls to wear boxers and a wife beater white tee. Maybe just cut off jean shorts and the wife beater and the sunglasses that flip down over your regular glasses frames.

Read more on Lawn Mower Push It Push It Real Good T shirt…

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We have a pun here, which I like to classify as wordplay in my system just to keep the categories clean and succinct. I like the simplicity of the message. I like the artwork on this shirt. I like the fine high cheek bones of the model wearing the tee. Basically, I like everything about it and I’m trying to impress upon you that you should love it just as much, or perhaps, more.

Read more on Beards They Grow On You T Shirt…

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Yo! I’ll solve it. Solve what you ask. This thing where you’re tired of the same ol’ same ol’ and would like a little taste of something way out there in the funny t shirt biosphere. Well, I got the goods for you, and they come in a little package called TopatoCo. Read my review of this TopatoCo phenomenon sweeping through the rarefied waves of super special appreciators of rare, raw humor.

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This is just a cool looking shirt. Han Solo was always cool. Harrison Ford was handsome and he had a bit of caustic wit and he always did it his way. Combine that with a weird and so shallow he was deep Andy Warhol and you have an amazing collision of substance and style and pop culture. I almost feel like if too many people wear this Double Solo Warhol T Shirt it may create an pop culture vortex that will suck up any and all that enjoy movies, music, and television…and viral Youtube videos. Almost like the Second Coming of Christ, except instead of Christians being whisked away it’s entertainment addicts.

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Let me tell you about Topatoco. I just stumbled upon this pretty great site that features original designs by hot shit artists that have the slightly skewed perspective on things that the uber creative often possess. It’s not for everybody, but if the other fork in the road is your bag, if twisted takes on culture and life and Lady Gaga and Edward James Olmos, and Jesus riding dinosaurs is something that gives you trembling pleasure, then you probably need to visit soon for maximum sensory stimuli.

The sell prints (as in posters and shit), mugs, books, and accessories (like neckties, magnets, plush toys, and bags, but most important…at least for this blog that features funny t shirts, they have a terrific assortment of shirts that are different than just the latest funny line from a Will Ferrell movie, or a joke about nerds staring at computers, or gamers getting repetitive motion injuries, or bacon. Well, they probably have shirts that cover nearly all that stuff, but it comes from a different, way out angle…like driving rain that looks like it’s going horizontal rather than vertical.

Read more on Shop Review: Topatoco Means Spectacular Artist Creative Outlet in Atlantisian Island Dialect…

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Love sticking a video game extra life green mushroom, into a real live combat situation. That soldier is reaching out like it’s his last chance to continue living in the hell that is war. It’s nice to switch it up, because most Mario Bros. Shirts are just kind of cute. This Green Mushroom 1 Up T Shirt brings a bit of gritty realism to the table. Planes dropping bombs in the background. A fighting man in fatigues. Strain on a more real looking face.

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There Will Be Blood was a great movie, and this line comes at one of the most gripping and twisted parts. You can’t keep your eye off of Daniel Day-Lewis as he pours his soul into the role of the whacked, evil and philosophical oil man Daniel Plainview.

Read more on There Will Be Blood I Drink Your Milkshake T Shirt…

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Just like my gramma used to do. Get up early…old people can’t help it because they go to bed at like 5:30 PM because they have nothing to do, so they get up at about 2 AM and start pottering around the house. Gramma would roll out the dough and shape it into perfectly round cinnamon rolls. Ah, the days we used to stay at her house were grand. I’d get up at 10 AM and there would be the perfect breakfast.

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Polite as Fuck T Shirt

by on January 21, 2011

The thing that is amazing about this shirt is the size of the scripty font. It’s huge. Basically, you have the biggest “fuck” possible on your shirt. So, don’t wear this around the kids, please. They’re not ready to process this sort of edgy business. Now, if you’re 32-years-old or older then please enjoy the obscene contradiction and make your 32 and over friends laugh. Under 32, then I certainly hope you are not even reading this, and if you are, I’m sorry. You should go to confession. And, tell you mom, and probably go shovel the snowy sidewalks of your own volition, just to sort of make up for your transgression.

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