July 2010

Yo Yo Yoyo Tshirt

by on July 27, 2010

Simple, silly, and alright with me. I love the “Yo” “Yo” Yoyo conversation tshirt. There is such a culture behind the yoyo from kids that can’t make it work worth shit to professionals getting laid because they have such dynamic skills with string and the plastic sandwich cookie or burger bun. Am I right? They look like that right? You just said to yourself that comparison is so funny because “IT’S TRUE!”

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Fat people celebrate. Southwest Airlines did a solid for one of your kind, and inconvenienced a tiny little waif to boot. Win Win. After the kerfuffle about kicking off a too fat passenger several weeks ago, Southwest decided to make it right by kicking off a skinny chick so a young fat chick could squeeze into two seats on the fully booked flight.

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Did you watch the season premiere of Mad Men last night? Of course, you did and so did Warming Glow, who sums up the Thanksgiving Hooker feast nicely.

The folks at Nerdy Shirts dream of being Don Draper every night as 11:30 p.m. Kinda weird really.

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I have no idea why, but this whole drama makes me laugh. Maybe it’s because Rick Pitino writes success books like, Rebound Rules: The Art of Success 2.0 and Success Is a Choice: Ten Steps to Overachieving in Business and Life, yet he’s embroiled in an extortion/rape case that involves the future wife of an assistant coach.

Read more on Pitino Alleged Extortion Trial Starts Today…

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Ants on a Log Tshirt

by on July 26, 2010

That’s a very delish snack. Raisins, celery, and peanut butter. Of course, I could get all snobby and say it’s gotta be local, in season, organic celery, flame raisins, and almond butter instead of the moldy ass peanut butter, but that would deflate the childlike fun bubble that’s been blown just seeing a homemade snack on a tshirt. So, I won’t get all foodie asshole on you, but really, you should be eating the organic shit.

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Took me a second to figure out the initialism and for those that are having similar issues, this is a high-impact collision between pop religious culture What Would Jesus Do (WWJD) wrist bands and the resulting mockery putting all kinds of initials in place of the “J” for Jesus and moving those people to the status of prophet or solid purveyor of wisdom.

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I always wondered what that saying meant. I mean, why would waking up on the wrong side of the bed make you grumpy? Or maybe it’s a deeper statement about you as a person. “Oh, bad mood, you must have woken up on the wrong side of the bed,” which really means “you’re such a miserable creature of habit that any slight upset to your iron-clad routine knocks you into a funk.”

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Train Wreck Tshirt

by on July 24, 2010

Is this a shout out to Tetris. Or am I missing some picayune pop culture reference that anyone under the age of 16 knows. All I know the art looks good and the concept of wearing a Train Wreck Tshirt on your chest seems hard core.

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Hey, nothing stops potential bullies or muggers in their tracks than telling them from the outset that you have high friends in places. I mean, they hear that and they’re like, “well, then hook me up with the Bubblegum Kush, Orange Krush, Jamaican Gold, or even the little strips.” Then, they haven’t mugged you, you still have your beautiful face intact and your cash on your person, and you’ve made a new weed buddy. Win-Win.

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Very simple concept with exceptional results. One, that bear, deer, beer animal is cool looking on the shirt. Two, you think this is one of those misdirection shirts like when they have a picture of a toilet with the word garden underneath it, or perhaps the flag of Austria with the word Sudan under it. But, on second glance, this is not that. This is one of those combine two words and get another word, except the totally awesome part is you get a well-known beloved word…beer.

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Bacon is quite delicious and does make everything better: eggs, pancakes, sandwiches, macaroni, chocolate, and hamhocks. Don’t talk to me about fakin’ bacon, soy bacon, dog doodoo bacon, or whatever “substitute” meat the “health gurus” are telling you about. You need the real deal. Pig, pork, swine, the other white meat.

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This is just one of those PSA “Slow your roll” tshirts that we all need to see and digest at times. Always good to have reminders to keep the speed down, to stop texting while driving, and, of course, to avoid the red turtle shells that sort of look like granades…at least in Mario Kart they do. Many  believe the red turtle shells are the most wicked weapons in the history of video games.

Read more on Leading Causes of Car Accidents: Speeding, Texting, Turtle Shells T-Shirt…

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