December 2009

This is an incredible dis on your mama. Total burn. It’s like twice as wicked as “Your mama goes to college.” Rocket science certainly ain’t easy and, yes, your Mom is. So the tshirt speaks deep truth. On a side note, if you wear a shirt with this type of power math, you announce to the world that you are a serious M’Fer.

Read more on If It Were Easy It’d Be Your Mom Tshirt…

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The Bull and the Bee Tee

by on December 27, 2009

This shirt has a joie de vivre that makes it totally eligible for Funny Tshirt of the Day status. A bull blowing a bubble. A bee threatening to pop that bubble. Those are the random sort of shenanigans that we fully, 100% endorse here.

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All the teachers up in here just craughed a little right there. You know the cry-laugh combo that happens when a joke hits way too close to home. Especially, right now, as they sit home on Winter Break and reflect. Trying to look at the bright side – tons of days off. However, then the overall picture comes into focus and they remember they are poorly compensated. Then, they’ll get all philosophical as they link about how little emphasis (or rather value) is placed on the molding of future adults minds.

Read more on I’d Be Happy To Teach You How to Live on a Shitty Salary Tee…

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Merry Christmas! Be lazy this holiday season! Make a New Year’s Resolution to be roustabout. Make slothfulness your goal, ‘cuz it pays off immediately. Instant gratification baby. You could lay up your stores for winter like the ant, then get hit by a bus. Where does that get you, grasshopper?

Read more on Hard Work Pays Off in the Future — Laziness Pays Off Now Tshirt…

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Wow. Are you honored or disgusted when you discover this. It’s so confusing. The first eight years of your life, you believed Santa was real. Then, you catch your Mom wrapping presents and your Dad eating the cookies on the plate left for jolly Saint Nick. And, your whole conception of  Christmas, and festivity, and even the trust of your parents is blown apart.

Read more on Santa Rubbed His Balls on Your Toothbrush Tee Shirt…

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Damn. Kinda hot fo’ shiz, this holiday hookup. I mean, when you got the dough and the fame, it doesn’t take much to convince MILFs to give it up. You can be a fat goofy old cat, and still get it anywhere and everywhere. It’s just the name of the game.

Read more on I Saw Mommy Kissing Mrs. Claus Tee…

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Can’t be exclude the other celebrations when wishing Happy Holidays, so here’s a token Kwanzaa shout out. What’s cool is that it just takes Santa, makes him black and gives him dialog like he’s the crack dealer’s boss.

Read more on Merry Kwanzaa Bitches T-shirt…

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Um, this is pretty hilarious. It’s one of those classic… I just said something horrible and I meant every word, but socially it was the wrong move, so I should try to clean it up the best I can right now. Except, it comes out totally insincere because it’s right on the heals of a heinous heartfelt proclamation. It feels hollow, forced, and probably makes the situation worse.

Read more on Your Mom is a Whore Merry Christmas Tshirt…

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I Put Out for Santa Tee

by on December 20, 2009

Little play on words here. You got the cookies “put out” but you know what’s really going on here. If you want the premium service from jolly Saint Nick you gotta go ahead and give him premium service on his chubby little…di…ning habits.

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Xmasochist Tee Shirt

by on December 20, 2009

Hey, this was one of those things where you live and let live. Whatever happens behind closed doors is none of my business. But, then with this everybody’s a star, and “unauthorized” release of star sex videos, and social networking, Twitter, Facebook, YouTube, and Google knowing your every move with maps and Android phone, welp, nothing is secret or sacred any more. All your shit is hanging out for everybody to see, including, incredibly, Santa and his bound babe.

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Darth Vader Pinata Tshirt

by on December 19, 2009

buy-tshirt-buttondarth-vader-pinata-shirtWhat you can’t see in this picture is that Darth just pushed aside five little children to get his chance at the pinata. It’s little known that Vader has a sweet tooth, and can’t wait to get at the candy that is making this innocent little papier-mache donkey burst at the seams.

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Hey…no need to go and have horrifying experiences in Vegas, including strapping a mutant, sun glasses wearing child in a sling to be cool like Zach Galifianakis. Just get yourself this lovely tee and you’re golden. And don’t worry. What doesn’t happen in Vegas, doesn’t stay in Vegas, so you can wear this beaut in Cleveland and get the same effect. Pure adulation from every body you know, especially your Aunt Tilde and your best friend’s mom.

Read more on The Hangover Baby Sling Tshirt…

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